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nothing is worse than just sitting there. Leave it with someone who you can trust to start the engine every other week to a month for 3 minutes and better yet drive it around the block. A run around the block will keep all moving pieces in shape, top off the battery and get a new layer of oil...

gotcha, well I'm surprised there'd be any battery left overnight and in your bad weather scenario who wants to stand out to get a jump start in the morning :-) Seriously, that' maybe make more sense if there was a relay so the lights would flash. Save some battery and draw more attention at...

why would you want ANY exterior lights illuminated in that situation?

I have never seen this behavior in a car before so it's probably an electrical issue. The turn signals don't turn off after removing the keys and leaving the car. There's a buzzing alarm type sound that accompany's this so I'm thinking it knows this is not right. It's totally repeatable and...