183 g/s on a S3 BAM

Lol, Welly, I read that as "spend some time on the missus".

Finesse mate, same at all Total Fitness I have been in. One lass in my local (Wilmslow, NW) is on the matts doing situps every night I'm there. Low slung tight tup with stomach on show. Tits the size of melons. Clearly on the lookout for her next body builder boyfriend.

I'll be interested to see my results tonight. Feeling the car has got a little slower recently, but think it is purely down to me getting use to it.
 
JD09 said:
Lol, Welly, I read that as "spend some time on the missus".
Click to expand...

Hmmmmmm. That would be more enticing I must admit. However, such activities have been banned until I front up the money for a holiday. She thinks it will stop me spending the money for holidays on the car.

WRONG. I have bought a 3" downpipe and sports cat, and a scrambler midi moto this weekend. She doesn't know yet....

It won't go down well. At all.

JD09 said:
I'll be interested to see my results tonight.
Click to expand...

With the car, or the bird with the melons? LOL.:sign_pics:
 
Lol, good banter! The car lad, although I'll take the iPhone and take some photos next time :sly:

Double lol at you buying all that stuff!
 
183 / 0.8 = 228.75

183 x 1.25 = 228.75

Niether gives the higher bhp figure so which one am I going to chose??? lol
 
was gona say they would both give your the same result... lol.

get some pics up of this lass in the gym, might encourage me too join a gym
 
JD09 said:
Lol, Welly, I read that as "spend some time on the missus".

Finesse mate, same at all Total Fitness I have been in. One lass in my local (Wilmslow, NW) is on the matts doing situps every night I'm there. Low slung tight tup with stomach on show. Tits the size of melons. Clearly on the lookout for her next body builder boyfriend.

I'll be interested to see my results tonight. Feeling the car has got a little slower recently, but think it is purely down to me getting use to it.
Click to expand...

Chester must have the some of the pretties girls about!
 
finesse said:
Would like to know too...
Click to expand...

Spoke to them today and yes, you get the surcharge back on receipt of your old MAF, as long as it's in a re-servicable condition. Actual price is £55 +VAT for the Bosch item.

On a side note, it's always good to have some eye candy when at the gym...makes you work harder :hubbahubba:
 
OllieH said:
Spoke to them today and yes, you get the surcharge back on receipt of your old MAF, as long as it's in a re-servicable condition. Actual price is £55 +VAT for the Bosch item.

On a side note, it's always good to have some eye candy when at the gym...makes you work harder :hubbahubba:
Click to expand...

Excellent stuff Ollie! Rather spend at Euro the the Audi stealer!!

I wonder if these MAF'S are actually brand new or refrubed or just measure to protect themselves from "returns"
 
I havent seen a female in my gym for months :(
...may have to join the local health and racquet club lol
And £297 for a new MAF!!! does that come with the TIP and turbo too?
 
That MAF reading is pretty much stock.

Perhaps instead of the MAF being faulty, the car isnt actually mapped at all....
 
finesse said:
I wonder if these MAF'S are actually brand new or refrubed or just measure to protect themselves from "returns"
Click to expand...

It does say on the 'surcharge' description that some of their parts are refurbished items..... I'm hoping that won't make a difference. Surely they change all the important bits and just keep the body??
 
I just been doing some logging and recorded a highest of 188 g/s on a standard map which is pretty good, equates to 235 bhp standard using the 0.8 way
 
Mine failed big time last night :( kept getting a "too many communication errors" report when I try and highlight each block :(
 
Have you got the correct COM port for the USB port you are using.
 
S3 Nattie said:
Have you got the correct COM port for the USB port you are using.
Click to expand...

You won't get as far as the measuring blocks if you haven't got the right COM port. It needs to connect up to the Engine Controller before you can even get to access measuring blocks.
 
That's the issue Welly, it's the right port as it reads the cars basic data. I scanned, no fault codes. Came to log, clicked on 001 Engine and it kept refreshing then came up with the error above :(
 
Welly said:
You won't get as far as the measuring blocks if you haven't got the right COM port. It needs to connect up to the Engine Controller before you can even get to access measuring blocks.
Click to expand...


Ye I no but you will not be able to get through to the engine controller if you havent got the correct port
 
JD09 said:
That's the issue Welly, it's the right port as it reads the cars basic data. I scanned, no fault codes. Came to log, clicked on 001 Engine and it kept refreshing then came up with the error above :(
Click to expand...

Are you running it on vista or xp
 
S3 Nattie said:
Ye I no but you will not be able to get through to the engine controller if you havent got the correct port
Click to expand...

This is my point mate, to actually be able to read fault codes or access the measuring blocks button at all, you have to be connected to the engine controller - meaning it's found the cable and is connecting on the correct COM port.
 
XP on the "other" laptop. My laptop won't work with it as it can't find the port and I don't know how to change it in Vista :( Any knowledge on that side of things?
 
JD09 said:
XP on the "other" laptop. My laptop won't work with it as it can't find the port and I don't know how to change it in Vista :( Any knowledge on that side of things?
Click to expand...

Easy dude, type DEVMGMT.MSC into the 'search' pane at the bottom of the Start Menu and press enter. This will give you device manager, from there it's the same as XP.
 
Legend. Will try it on my comp when I get home. Mine holds battery lol!

edit; keep forgetting you're in IT (when you're not being a grease monkey!).
 
JD09 said:
Legend. Will try it on my comp when I get home. Mine holds battery lol!

edit; keep forgetting you're in IT (when you're not being a grease monkey!).
Click to expand...

My skills in both departments are greatly exaggerated.... LOL. :icon_thumright:
 
I heard your skills in three departments were exaggerated . . . oh no he di'nt.

Lol. Appreciate your help lad, will report back with how many less horses my car has than the yellow beasty!
 
Welly said:
This is my point mate, to actually be able to read fault codes or access the measuring blocks button at all, you have to be connected to the engine controller - meaning it's found the cable and is connecting on the correct COM port.
Click to expand...

See what you mean. I thought JD09 couldnt get through to the controller meanings he is not using the right COM.

JD09, when you do get it on the correct COM with your other laptop, run it as administrator otherwise it may crash all the time, does it with me.
 
S3 Nattie said:
See what you mean. I thought JD09 couldnt get through to the controller meanings he is not using the right COM.

JD09, when you do get it on the correct COM with your other laptop, run it as administrator otherwise it may crash all the time, does it with me.
Click to expand...

Yeah, Vista sucks some serious pene.

The other option there is just to turn User Account Control (UAC) off completely, which then removes that as a problem. That's what I have done on both my Vista and Windows 7 laptops. This has the added benefit of not bugging the **** out of you every time you want to do anything at all.

Instructions here: http://www.petri.co.il/disable_uac_in_windows_vista.htm

I put a link as couldn't ***** to explain.... lol.
 
When you get it all up and working post up your results.

I got 188 g/s last night and my boost is spiking to about 17 psi and holding a bar. Seems rather high considering im running standard map
 
S3 Nattie said:
When you get it all up and working post up your results.

I got 188 g/s last night and my boost is spiking to about 17 psi and holding a bar. Seems rather high considering im running standard map
Click to expand...

What N75 valve? Stock or J?
 
Welly said:
Ouch. Nuf said....



Presumably meaning the bain of my existence?!?! LOL. It's a good job I like it else it would be light rag in the fuel tank time....
Click to expand...

Lol, you love it.

S3 Nattie said:
When you get it all up and working post up your results.

I got 188 g/s last night and my boost is spiking to about 17 psi and holding a bar. Seems rather high considering im running standard map
Click to expand...

Will do lad, and yes, 188 = 235 bhp standard . . . !
 
Did you log it before?

The reason I ask being that the J Valve is notoriously more spikey than the C valve which is why they get fitted. I would say that is the cause for your extra boosty plops.... But I wouldn't complain too much..... LOL! :icon_thumright:
 
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