Man says to wife 'I had a wet dream about you last night; I dreamt
you got run over by a bus and I pi*s*s*ed myself laughing'.
A woman asked her hubby if he knew how she could make her bust
bigger. He said 'try rubbing toilet paper between your t*i*ts; it's worked
for youre a*r*se'.
My uncle just got struck off the medical register for having s*e*x
with his patients; it's a real shame because he's a really good vet.
Woman walks past a pet shop with a sign reading 'For sale cl*i*toris
licking frog' she goes in and the shopkeeper say's 'Bonjour
madame'.
Yesterday I read an article about the dangers of drinking too much,
it scared the s**t out of me. So today I decided I'm never reading
again.
Little girl gets lost in Tesco's, security guard asks her 'what's
you mum like?' Little girl replies 'Big c*o*cks and vodka'.
A couple in a cafe in Llangollen asks 'Can you settle an argument
for us and pronounce where we are, VERY slowly?' The waitress leaned
over and said ........ 'Burrr gurrr king'.
Boss has to lay off Ann or Jack. Ann walks into the office, boss
say's I have a problem, I have to lay you or Jack off....Ann says 'You
better jack off, I've got a headache'.
Larry la Prise who wrote the hokey cokey has died aged 93. The
worst part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in,
then the trouble started.
Paul McCartney poem-: We lay upon the grassy bank, my hands were
all a quiver, I slowly undid her suspender belt and her leg fell in the
river.
Sorry I haven't been in touch, a friend was rushed to hospital to
have a dangerous mole removed from his pen*i*s...... he won't be
sha*g*g*ing
one of those again!
It's important to keep fit as you get older; my granny started
walking 5 kilometres a day when she was 60. Today she's 97 and we don't
know where the hell she is!
Tampax have replaced the string on their tampons with a piece of
tinsel.... They say it's only for the Christmas period.
A woman goes to her doctor with a bit of lettuce hanging out of her
Pu*s*s*y. Doc say's 'that looks nasty'. She say's 'Nasty?, it's just
the tip of the iceberg!
Two newly weds turn up at a hotel and ask for the honeymoon suite,
the receptionist asks 'do you have reservations?' The bride answers
'Yes, I won't take it up the a*r*se'
you got run over by a bus and I pi*s*s*ed myself laughing'.
A woman asked her hubby if he knew how she could make her bust
bigger. He said 'try rubbing toilet paper between your t*i*ts; it's worked
for youre a*r*se'.
My uncle just got struck off the medical register for having s*e*x
with his patients; it's a real shame because he's a really good vet.
Woman walks past a pet shop with a sign reading 'For sale cl*i*toris
licking frog' she goes in and the shopkeeper say's 'Bonjour
madame'.
Yesterday I read an article about the dangers of drinking too much,
it scared the s**t out of me. So today I decided I'm never reading
again.
Little girl gets lost in Tesco's, security guard asks her 'what's
you mum like?' Little girl replies 'Big c*o*cks and vodka'.
A couple in a cafe in Llangollen asks 'Can you settle an argument
for us and pronounce where we are, VERY slowly?' The waitress leaned
over and said ........ 'Burrr gurrr king'.
Boss has to lay off Ann or Jack. Ann walks into the office, boss
say's I have a problem, I have to lay you or Jack off....Ann says 'You
better jack off, I've got a headache'.
Larry la Prise who wrote the hokey cokey has died aged 93. The
worst part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in,
then the trouble started.
Paul McCartney poem-: We lay upon the grassy bank, my hands were
all a quiver, I slowly undid her suspender belt and her leg fell in the
river.
Sorry I haven't been in touch, a friend was rushed to hospital to
have a dangerous mole removed from his pen*i*s...... he won't be
sha*g*g*ing
one of those again!
It's important to keep fit as you get older; my granny started
walking 5 kilometres a day when she was 60. Today she's 97 and we don't
know where the hell she is!
Tampax have replaced the string on their tampons with a piece of
tinsel.... They say it's only for the Christmas period.
A woman goes to her doctor with a bit of lettuce hanging out of her
Pu*s*s*y. Doc say's 'that looks nasty'. She say's 'Nasty?, it's just
the tip of the iceberg!
Two newly weds turn up at a hotel and ask for the honeymoon suite,
the receptionist asks 'do you have reservations?' The bride answers
'Yes, I won't take it up the a*r*se'
