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What do you use to remove dreaded bird droppings from your pride and joy?

q5man Aug 2, 2018

  1. q5man

    q5man Mythos Appreciator Team Mythos TFSI Owners Group Gold Supporter quattro Audi Q5

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    Interested to hear what everyone uses?

    Unless doing the obvious full snowfoam/wash etc, if I spot one when I am in a rush I:

    1. Swear profusely, and threaten to shoot them all. (birds that is).
    2. Grab a clean MF & QD spray (Keep in boot, rotating after each use).
    3. Spray on whilst holding MF below said sh*t.
    4. Slow wipe in one direction.
    5. Repeat if necessary ensuring to use clean part of MF.
    6. If it is on a larger area like the bonnet, often end up QD'ing the whole bonnet.
    7. Finish with buff using plush MF.

    I have watched a few videos, where some (like Forensic Detailing bloke) uses a sponge soaked in ONR etc
     
    Last edited: Aug 2, 2018
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  3. voorhees

    voorhees Moderator Staff Member Moderator Team V8 Audi S5 S tronic

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    This is my method,soak with a wet paper tissue/napkin/kitchen roll then after five minutes (depending on size) hose or pour water on said droppings and they come off, never had any marks left.
     
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  4. Leo Komninos

    Leo Komninos Member

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    An air rifle.

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  5. Abi

    Abi Member

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    I just use hot water, part boiled kettle, no where near boiling may I add! pour over poop, leave a sponge over to soak then rinse off again with hot water,
    Had red cars since forever and never had a mark left. But get it off assp lol


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
     
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  6. q5man

    q5man Mythos Appreciator Team Mythos TFSI Owners Group Gold Supporter quattro Audi Q5

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    Brilliant :respekt:
     
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  7. q5man

    q5man Mythos Appreciator Team Mythos TFSI Owners Group Gold Supporter quattro Audi Q5

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    Any thoughts @jassyo06 @Tashfeen @scotty76 @Supa Koopa @A4A4
     
  8. Leo Komninos

    Leo Komninos Member

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    Sorry far too obvious...

    There is this 12 months protector i use: Turtle Wax extra gloss sealer wax.
    Every year i do a deep clean, clay bar it with Mer's detailer spray, wax and sealer wax.
    Don't have any issues, and i park under our morello cherry tree.
    Mind you i don't constantly wash it just the occasional rinse with a jet wash.
     
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  9. q5man

    q5man Mythos Appreciator Team Mythos TFSI Owners Group Gold Supporter quattro Audi Q5

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    :sign hijacked::sign spam::sign ot:
     
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  10. Leo Komninos

    Leo Komninos Member

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    Sorry made me laugh, deleted.

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  11. q5man

    q5man Mythos Appreciator Team Mythos TFSI Owners Group Gold Supporter quattro Audi Q5

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    No need to apologise, was funny. My emoji's were in jest
     
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  13. Scotty75

    Scotty75 Well-Known Member Team Brilliant Black Silver Supporter Audi A3 Sportback S-line owners group Manual

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    MF and QD spray for me....... Plus a good dose of cussing.......

    Sent from my HTC 10 using Tapatalk
     
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  14. boffin486

    boffin486 Well-Known Member

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    A cold cut chisel 'cos I swear the effing birds around here dine exclusively on cement mix.....
     
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  15. CC-SQ5

    CC-SQ5 Member

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    I would normally recommend some sort of citrus cleaner such as bug and grime from Auto Finesse, or if all you have handy is a QD then a decent application let it soak and then MF it off gently.

    Sent from my SM-G950F using Tapatalk
     
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  16. Toonsoldier91

    Toonsoldier91 Active Member

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    Baby wipe left on for a couple minutes. If it's safe enough to wipe a baby's bum it's safe enough for my car lol
     
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  17. pxr5

    pxr5 Active Member Team Mythos TDi A7 Owner Group Black Edition quattro S-line owners group

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    ONR is my favoured method.
     
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  18. q5man

    q5man Mythos Appreciator Team Mythos TFSI Owners Group Gold Supporter quattro Audi Q5

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    Might get some ONR, when it is next in stock anywhere. The threat of hosepipe bans must have boosted sales big time :tearsofjoy:
     
  19. scotty76

    scotty76 Well-Known Member Team Phantom Audi S4

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    I spray the poo with water and put a wet kitchen towel on the offending item. Leave for 5 mins. Then rinse with the hose (or watering can depending on where in the country you are :D ). With a good coating on the car I'd say this works 99% of the time. The key is to leave it, don't be impatient and only wait one minute! If that doesn't work I use sprays of ONR mixed to QD strength and rinse again. And as a last stop I use ONR and a microfiber to remove.
     
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  20. scotty76

    scotty76 Well-Known Member Team Phantom Audi S4

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  21. q5man

    q5man Mythos Appreciator Team Mythos TFSI Owners Group Gold Supporter quattro Audi Q5

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  22. Rideen

    Rideen Well-Known Member Team Brilliant Black saloon TDi Audi A3 Manual

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    Using baby wipes which I always have in the car for situations like this. Let them soak a bit then take the ******* off while trying not to vomit. Sometimes I fail on the vomitting part.
     
  23. scotty76

    scotty76 Well-Known Member Team Phantom Audi S4

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    Really? Never had an issue. I guess I do buy from big sellers though.
     
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  24. q5man

    q5man Mythos Appreciator Team Mythos TFSI Owners Group Gold Supporter quattro Audi Q5

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    Probably being ridiculous, as it is only ONR and not RayBans or Chanel perfume after all :tearsofjoy:
     
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  25. V6Tom

    V6Tom Active Member Team V6 TDi Audi A5 quattro S tronic Coupe Coral Blue

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    +1 For ONR i use it all the time. I had a bird leave me a present on my hood a day after detailing it

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  26. Paulbean

    Paulbean New Member Team Mythos Audi RS3 Saloon

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    Sort of the same as the OP, in the boot I have diluted snowfoam in a spray bottle to get it off, then QD to tidy up with a fresh microfibre...
     
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  27. V6Tom

    V6Tom Active Member Team V6 TDi Audi A5 quattro S tronic Coupe Coral Blue

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    I'm getting my car ceramic coated so bird burns will be a thing of the past for me

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  28. q5man

    q5man Mythos Appreciator Team Mythos TFSI Owners Group Gold Supporter quattro Audi Q5

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    Mine is ceramic coated already, just can't be too careful or guarantee that it won't burn through protective coat
     
  29. V6Tom

    V6Tom Active Member Team V6 TDi Audi A5 quattro S tronic Coupe Coral Blue

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    I guess caution is the best approach. But as far as my knowledge a good well maintained coating should be unaffected by bird droppings? Like if you have a ceramic coating and you use silica dioxide sealents ontop of that and so on? And regular maintenance?

    Obviously i dont mean if its left there for weeks on end but it should be okay for the day?

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  30. q5man

    q5man Mythos Appreciator Team Mythos TFSI Owners Group Gold Supporter quattro Audi Q5

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    agree, I am probably a bit OTT, but do use "top-up" treatments such as CarPro Reload, and other QD's regularly post wash.
     
  31. V6Tom

    V6Tom Active Member Team V6 TDi Audi A5 quattro S tronic Coupe Coral Blue

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    What coating do you have may i ask? My cars booked in for a full paint correction and polish and a coating. I went with sea quatz uk

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  32. q5man

    q5man Mythos Appreciator Team Mythos TFSI Owners Group Gold Supporter quattro Audi Q5

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  34. Peter123

    Peter123 Member TFSI Owners Group Team Navarra Audi Q5 Navarra Blue Classic S-line owners group S tronic

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  35. CarbonMike

    CarbonMike Active Member Team Brilliant Black Audi A4 Black Edition quattro

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    Wait for it to rain most of the time... dont have the time or inclination to faff around with valeting products lol

    Done this method on over 30 cars spanning the last 16 years without paint issues.
     
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  36. q5man

    q5man Mythos Appreciator Team Mythos TFSI Owners Group Gold Supporter quattro Audi Q5

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    haha, fair enough, can't argue with that. Must have been a long wait for rain this summer :whistle2:
     
  37. CarbonMike

    CarbonMike Active Member Team Brilliant Black Audi A4 Black Edition quattro

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    Sure was down on the South Coast!

    I did get car washed during the summer, ended up with a huge bird present on the roof by the next morning & ended up getting done again
     
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  38. Peter123

    Peter123 Member TFSI Owners Group Team Navarra Audi Q5 Navarra Blue Classic S-line owners group S tronic

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    So you always leave really heavy pigeon droppings on your car for weeks at a time? There are no etchings in your top coat? Seriously?

    This reminds me of my friend who always say " I wash my car once a year, whether it needs it or not".
     
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  39. CarbonMike

    CarbonMike Active Member Team Brilliant Black Audi A4 Black Edition quattro

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    Ive never really had massive turds on any car to be honest. Ive owned this A4 since Jan, washed it myself for the first time on Saturday just gone.

    Mostly just leave them. Sometims ill run it around a car wash if its baked on in the middle of summer but other then that meh.

    Some people are into detailing, some people keep things clean an tidy & and some people just drive the damn thing...
     
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  40. jdp1962

    jdp1962 Grumpy Old Moderator Staff Member Moderator TFSI Owners Group Team V6 Gold Supporter Team Tornado Audi S4 Black Edition quattro S tronic

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    Human saliva is a very good quick detailing fluid.
     
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  41. Bristle Hound

    Bristle Hound Moderator Staff Member Moderator MQB Platform

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    ^ this or the QD method for me
    Depends on amount of **** :puke2:
     
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  42. A4A4

    A4A4 Well-Known Member

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    Does not seem a problem for this owner!

    upload_2018-11-3_10-46-22.png
     
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  43. johnnythepie

    johnnythepie Well-Known Member

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    Wet paper towel and a careful wipe with a mfc.Have used supagard bird lime foam which is ok (only product from them that is). If its stained, then as soon as poss blow the stain with a hot air gun and 9 times out of ten watch it vanish.
     
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