And now it's fixed
Ha Ha Ha Ha the cats out of the bag now....
I didn't want to prematurely write anything until I'd had a chance to properly drive the car around, but to the TLDR guys, in short Rick @ Unicorn Motor Developments has fixed it
Bit more detail below for those who are interested
First thing Rick noticed was the gearbox was running on stock software, despite their being a factory update available, so it hadn't been previously fiddled with and he promptly ironed out that by bringing the software up to date.
Next was his custom mapping for the engine and gearbox, mixed with realtime Dyno testing and boy was that loud, really loud

and it went on for an eternity ha ha ha but necessary to do the job properly.
Then Rick took it out on a quick road test, came back and then got me to take it out on a road test with him in the car to get my feedback.... and I could tell almost immediately that it was different, massively different.
He has turned the car into an absolute hooligan, I still can't stop laughing when its motorway time or I need to go fast in urban environments, its wild !! It's not like the car was a slouch beforehand, but now its so fast, I darent bury the pedal for fear of what will become ha ha ha.
The gearbox shifts so much faster, no longer needlessly holding onto the gears and acting retarded, it knows what's requested of it and when to deliver it.
The engine pulls like a train, and in the few days its been since Rick has fixed it, I seem to now need both hands on the wheel when giving it some beans as the power coming through everything is raw... this is what I expected when buying an Audi Sport, but it was clearly missing... until Rick got to work on it.
Keeping it real, Rick explained how this is all as a result of the VW emissions scandal and these auto/diesels are literally programmed to ignore the driver and deliver a mediocre experience. Therefore, completely omitting any of this programming is impossible, but it can be made better, much better and true to his word, that's exactly how it's become.
However, there's still an adaptation period for both myself and the car, and I'm learning to drive it yet again, but this time it's behaving as it should. Yes, there's still a tiny amount of throttle hesitancy from a dead stop, but I think this can be overcome by my learning of how much pressure the pedal needs from a dead stop, but it's nowhere near as bad as it was. Yet, even with that small amount of hesitancy, the box and engine respond so much faster that it leaves you with no time to complain about it as that time has passed and you're flying again.
The car feels happier, it wants to go, its happy to take off, overtake or just boot it. For example; those single lane roads approaching traffic lights that open up to two lanes just before the lights, but the car in front is braking too early to stop, so you just pull out into the second lane and give it a tiny squirt to get through the lights on time, which is now simply delightful. Instant masses of power, in the correct gear, all delivered on demand, the feeling is just wonderful, the complete opposite of the heap of ***** it was acting as before I took it to Rick.
Motorway driving, it just pulls, no matter of the gear, but if I want it to move a bit more, i.e. someone is up my chuff, then a little squirt makes it just just take off and leave them as a spec in the rearview mirror, and when I say a little squirt, I mean it, I still haven't buried the pedal yet as this thing can get you from 0 to a ban way quicker than before.
Anyways, without going on like an old boiler, I would summarise it as this; I'm still learning to drive it again but now it's a fun and delightful hooligan. It was definitely worth enlisting the services of a professional like Rick to iron out its stupidity, and kudos to DJAlix who called it from the very start, that this was the only true fix for this car. The pedal box is garbage for this car and for added fun noticeably ruins your fuel economy, also I wouldn't be surprised if it contributed to longer term issues based on how bad it makes the car react.
So, if you're in need of this service and able to travel to Manchester, then I wouldn't hesitate in recommending Rick to fix this issue for you.
Rick, you're a legend mate and I thank you for unlocking my car's true potential and also allowing me to love it again, this was worth spending the money on

also, best of luck with the move to your new unit - PS thanks also to Chloe for constantly offering me drinks and making my wait as painless as possible, if she could ping me through a receipt when operational again, that would be greatly appreciated.
And finally, hopefully my documenting of this journey will be useful to others at some point in space and time
