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Weddings & Marriage

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by ScottD3, Jun 11, 2012.

  1. ScottD3

    ScottD3 I want your faulty electronics
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    Me and the misses has spoke about this for about a year but never with any real seriousness.
    Its all ways been spoke about in the future, when we get round to it and never right now.

    On the way back from our mates wedding on the weekend, this every couple of months conversation turned a little bit serious. To the point where we start talking about what we would like in rings and wedding receptions.
    That fine, I don't mind talking about it but I'm thinking its time. I like the idea and think it would be good, I then **** self, get really scared and want to vomit.

    We've been going out for 7 years this years, within that time we've seen people get married, buy a house and have 1 or more kids, we moved cities and got another dog.

    My question really is, how do you do it?

    How do you go from asking the question, getting the rings, picking the location, inviting friends, sorting out the suits, dresses, food, stag doo and any thing else?

    It hurts my head.
     
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  3. sideways steve

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    I am doing this right now, were getting hitched on the 8th September. Its actually all much easier than you think, there are a lot of things that need doing but just give yourself plenty of time to save and plan and you will be fine :)

    I think the advantage for me was that both my fiancee and I are quite decisive and know what we want so we made decisions pretty quickly and just got on with it ! I proposed in November 2010 so we have been planning the wedding since around the start of 2011.

    Just be prepared for the cost of everything, its ridiculous, they add zero's on to the end of anything you get prices for as soon as you mention its wedding related !
     
  4. jojo

    jojo Looking for Boost!
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    My missus did all mine, I just turned up! lol
     
  5. StateOfPlay

    StateOfPlay Well-Known Member

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    You pop the question.

    She does the rest.

    All you need to do is find the money, be prepared to travel and attend shopping trips, and agree with her as she huffs and puffs about what a nightmare it all is.

    Oh, and enjoy the stag night.

    Then, you turn up on the day, behave as if you are sober, say I do, start drinking, make a quick speech, and then get drunk.

    And apparently it is not acceptable to sleep with the chief bridesmaid.
     
  6. ScottD3

    ScottD3 I want your faulty electronics
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    That I could handle.

    This I could handle but doubt it would be that simple. lol

    I need to talk to her old man I think. :)
     
  7. Sandra

    Sandra MODERATOR
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    Lol guys, this thread has the potential to get really funny. :) x
     
  8. jojo

    jojo Looking for Boost!
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    If you've been together for 7 years, I don't see it a problem to make things official.

    It's usually the perfect day for the bride, so let the woman make all the choices and prep. ;)
     
  9. jojo

    jojo Looking for Boost!
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    If you've been together for 7 years, I don't see it a problem to make things official.

    It's usually the perfect day for the bride, so let the woman make all the choices and prep. ;)
     
  10. StateOfPlay

    StateOfPlay Well-Known Member

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    If her father says no, shake his hand and be grateful of the near miss.

    If her father says yes then you need to do some serious overtime!
     
  11. shariain

    shariain Well-Known Member

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    My wife done everything all I had to do was go out with the boys to get measured up for the kilts (had a right good piss up that day) then appear on the day.
     
  12. StateOfPlay

    StateOfPlay Well-Known Member

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    Even the Vicar tries to rob you blind.
     
  13. quattrojames

    quattrojames Moderator
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    Get married on a Friday, you'll save a fortune and the guests will love you for giving them a long weekend.
     
  14. sniffy_smiffy

    sniffy_smiffy Member

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    Me and Mrs Smith are quite laid back kinda peeps, we didn't want all the fuss of choosing all the venues and being ripped off etc etc. We went for a wedding in Zante on the beach. Just tailored the wedding package a bit, choosing colours etc, someone else did the rest just organised the flights/hotel and that was that. I had my Stag doo over in Greece while on holiday I was playing water polo in the morning before my wedding. Best thing I ever did !
    Would highly recommend it.
    Only cost us 7k for the whole thing. Not bad I thought ?

    Good luck mate whatever you end up doing. ;0)
     
  15. d4nny

    d4nny New Member

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    I just got married on the 12th of May it cost a fortune,after asking her dad all had to do was turn my head away from the telly to give a nod of approval turn up to a suit fitting (which i meed up)and turn up on the day,one thing i would say is get a really good photographer. Ally & Dan's Hallgarth Manor Wedding | Facebook thats one off 700 we got.
     
  16. d4nny

    d4nny New Member

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    (which i messed up)
    :whistle2:
     
  17. superkarl

    superkarl MAN OF STEEL

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    danny your wife is gorgeous!

    i dont feel the need to get married to be honest.
    scott if you're happy where you are and/or have more important things to do first, then why bother. It is just a status afterall.
    i've been with my girlfriend over 5 years now, the fact we arent married doesnt mean i love her less. we'l do it when its convenient, get other things over and done with first. to me it isnt a priority. to her its a status and ring thats important. but i guess its like that for all women, thats the appeal to them.

    get another dog. dogs are awesome!
     
  18. PAULF

    PAULF Active Member
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    Ask the question, only proceed further if she says yes!

    Go to a load of Wedding Exhibitions

    Send her to this forum Forums - Confetti.co.uk
    (When we got married, soon-to-be-Mrs PaulF got loads of really good gen from them about everything.)

    Set a budget, and the expect it to double!:scared2:

    Don't go on a course for a month the first week you are married! :asskicking:
     
  19. shariain

    shariain Well-Known Member

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    It's the most expensive piece of paper you will buy only to put it in a metal tube and put in a drawer out the way.

    But it will make her day.
     
  20. _G_

    _G_ Active Member

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    Here's how we did it... spoke to close friends/work mates for ideas on e.g. best florist... you may already know one if you have brought her flowers before... it just kind of fell into place... from flowers to catering to photography.. I spoke to my upper middle class boss for suggestions on wine/drinks for each meal... and most of it was testing and price matching... we narrowed catering down to about 3 caterers and had a taste session of the food then played them off each other to get a decent price... certain things can be left to her and certain things are yours... ask her how she feels about splitting the list... obviously she needs to sort out her make-up trials if she is going to hire an artist... before you do all that work out your budget.. and budget for a honeymoon as well!

    I sorted: the car, the entertainment, the food and photography/videography
    She sorted: flowers, her brides maids, her car to get there, wedding favours/wedding gift list and venue hire

    We criss-crossed a lot of the way to check we were happy with certain things e.g. photography - again narrowed it down, met them, viewed their work and decided a price... sorted. A few things I took on as a surprise e.g. the car/entertainment were mine and I wouldn't tell her but this is where it was special and checks that you have been "listening" hahaah... when we used to have our "chats" about marriage... she always told me what car she'd want to have for the wedding day... and I remembered! Wahey! So the little things make the difference.

    Took it a step at a time and had things written down... check list styleeee... 2 weeks before the big day... called everyone and made sure they were confirmed... all had been secured with deposit but 2-4 weeks before wedding final payments were made and all details checked... came down to: is this what we ordered, how much did we order, time, date etc. Breaking it down was most important thing for me... because if I did everything in one day or week then Id be snowed under... so different weekends came in useful... weekend at a wedding exhibition for ideas... a weekend visiting photographers...

    PM if you need any other ideas.

    ps. she knew I wanted a new S3 at the time... and I had to give that up but I didn't regret it... 4 years down the line I managed to get the S3... just had to put it off for a while.
     
    #19 _G_, Jun 12, 2012
    Last edited: Jun 12, 2012
  21. ScottD3

    ScottD3 I want your faulty electronics
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    Thanks for the info lads.

    Karl, we have the same thinking but we would like kids and a house at some point and feel it would be easier if we was married.

    I'm kind of lucky I guess with sarah, she don't like flowers, not in to cars and don't want a big wedding.
    She'd prefer a big party and loads of people. I guess that can make it a bit easier.

    I'm dropping her off to Heathrow on saturday and on the way back I'm going to stop off to bristol and see her dad and have a chat I think.
     
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  23. Brodster

    Brodster Well-Known Member
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    Its a piece of cake mate to do. Just organised ours in the space of about a month from invites, venue, honeymoon etc etc.
    If you dont wanna do it get a wedding planner. Costs alot but takes the so-called stress out of it as they do it all for you. Get contracts drawn up then you tell them what you want, give them the cash and they do it all. Simples!!!
     
  24. quattrojames

    quattrojames Moderator
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    :sos:
     
  25. consilio

    consilio Up the owls!

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    I am having the same problem at the moment. Been together 8 years, proposed in the sand dunes of Dubai last year and then took her shopping for a ring in the gold souks (got a massive rock for half the UK price)

    She would like to go to Hawaii for the big day, and that suits me since it means we would probably only invite close friends and relatives, rather than the people I cant be doing with. My biggest problem is the thought of my mum and dad in the same place together. They split about 20 yeard ago when I was 11, but the thought of it feels me with horror. They have only been in the same room together once since then at my grandads funeral, and it was amicable, but it still scares the **** out of me. Especially as if we do go abroad, there will be less people and therefore magnifying the problem.

    Do I have mental problems?
     
  26. ScottD3

    ScottD3 I want your faulty electronics
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    Nope. Not at all.
    I got that fear as well.
    My mum and dad split up when I was mum.
    I'm also scared of what could happen when they are in the same room with some drink.
     
  27. StateOfPlay

    StateOfPlay Well-Known Member

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    Mate, don't worry about it, it is YOUR big day and the two of them will behave impeccably. My Mum and Dad don't talk after they split up. Obviously there are still feelings there to deal with. But they both put those feelings behind them, Apart from a little dig here and there it was fine.

    I did feel tense and anxious about it while the whole wedding was building up. I wanted to be a coward and have a wedding with just us two and our best friends, but that wasn't the right thing.

    We stayed in the UK, and invited everyone we knew. And it was a bloody fantastic day! It would not have been as special if we hadn't invited all our friends and family.
     
  28. sidibear

    sidibear Looking for Zombies !!
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    On the 20th June I have been married for 20 Years, we are going to France for a nice little break.

    Our wedding cost £19. Yes really. I only had to pay the deposit on the registry office, on the day forgot my wallet and my parents paid the rest, about £20, organised and paid for the meal and also a few drinkys and meal in a nice restaurant later.

    Honeymoon? I was working in the USA at the time so we just flew back over to the accomodation and she enjoyed herself sunning on Virginia Beach while I worked.
     
  29. Peachy

    Peachy Member

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    Let your missus plan it all, easy!
     
  30. L33h

    L33h Member

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    Well I've decided not to get married. Too much money for a piece of paper and a ring!

    Plus saves money not having to get a divorce haha
     
  31. PAULF

    PAULF Active Member
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    I had decided that too - until the soon-to-be-Mrs PaulF told me otherwise, and became Mrs PaulF:whip:
     
  32. StateOfPlay

    StateOfPlay Well-Known Member

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    Oh come on! You didn't decide it, she is allowing you to think you can get away with it until the moment is right for her to strike and get you up the aisle.
     
  33. slepy

    slepy Extremely smart and handsome person.
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    Well, I'm at a bit earlier stage at the moment.
    I'm thinking about proposing and only one question comes to my mind - the ring!
    How on earth do you know what size ring to buy? :banghead:
     
  34. StateOfPlay

    StateOfPlay Well-Known Member

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    You don't, you guess which size and then once you have popped the question, you can get the ring resized.
     
  35. shariain

    shariain Well-Known Member

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    And you will still get the blame when it goes tits up.
     
  36. consilio

    consilio Up the owls!

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    I got around this by proposing on holiday in Dubai with a Haribo ring, then took her shopping the next day for a proper ring.

    I didn't have to worry about sizes

    She got to pick exactly what she wanted

    She got a much better ring for the money out there.
     
  37. missviper

    missviper Member

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    Did you just end up picking up the bill lol!!
     
  38. missviper

    missviper Member

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    We got married on the 11/11/11 at 11am ( some of you may find that cheesy) but the date and everything was very important to me, more so than the venue.
    We Just got married in a local registry office, with just close family.We had a black and red theme, i didn't want the traditional white dress thing, i do like to be different. After we said the vows etc..... we all went for a lovely meal and from there we drove down to the hotel airport. We flew off the next day starting our hooneymoon in Sri Lanka, followed by the Maldives and then Dubai. The best part was the hooneymoon. At the end of the day it's what you both want.
    Just make sure before you do it that you both want similar things out of life.
    I have just found out that my husband does not want anymore children. I'm gutted, i wanted a child, i have not got any and he already as some from previous realationships. Now i have that big decision to make and it's not easy.......
     
  39. Ash187

    Ash187 Audi-Retrofits.co.uk
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    for all you guys that are saying its expensive... be happy your not asian! the costs are horrendous! what with all the family that get invited (majority just eat your food and then leave anyway) and then the need to have a flashy wedding with supercars parked up front.

    I planned a wedding back in 2010 which was relatively cheap for asian weddings... still was going to cost me £15k! then we broke up a few months before the date so luckily no deposits were paid.
    might be going through it all again next year...

    good luck Scott, only advice i can give you is save up my friend... dont worry about the finer details, she will sort that out for you. just make sure you can pay for it.
     
  40. Gti Jazz Blue

    Gti Jazz Blue Active Member
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    You can get Married on a Cruise too, we just renewed our vows 10 years in on Ventura. It was a great day.

    That way you get the wedding and honeymoon all in one go, just take only a few close family along and all have a holiday together.

    How did Saturday go with her Father ?
     
  41. jojo

    jojo Looking for Boost!
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    How did you guess? I was proper skint afterwoods!

    Chinese weddings isn't far off, especially if you happen to be a popular/well known member of the community like my dad! My reception was 350 people!
     
  42. Ash187

    Ash187 Audi-Retrofits.co.uk
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    350, is that it? my wedding is anticipated to have over 700 people!!!
    I have told my parents not to invite most of them as most will just eat and leave without waiting around for the actual wedding to finish. I want a small wedding but getting the family to agree is like waging war
     

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