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Tuesday morning pre 9am joke.........

imported_mustwin1 Oct 26, 2004

  1. A guy goes into a bar, orders twelve shots and starts drinking them as fast as he can.
    The bartender says, "Dang, why are you drinking so fast?"

    The guy says, "You would be drinking fast if you had what I had."

    The bartender says, "What do you have?"

    The guy says, "50p."
  2. waveform2

    waveform2 * J e d i *

    Another /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif

    There are several men sitting around in the locker room of a golf club
    after a round, showering and getting changed for the 19th hole. Suddenly
    a mobile phone on one of the benches rings. One of the men picks it up,
    and the following conversation ensues:

    (H - Husband, W - Wife)
    H - "Hello?"

    W - "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?"

    H - "Yes."

    W - "Great! I am at the mall two blocks from where you are. I just saw a
    beautiful leather coat. It's absolutely gorgeous!! Can I buy it?"

    H - "What's the price?"

    W - "Only $1,000."

    H - "Well, OK, go ahead and get it, if you like it that much..."

    W - "Ahhh, and I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the 2003 models. I saw one I really liked. I spoke with the salesman, and he gave me a really good price...and since we need to exchange the BMW that we bought last year..."

    H - "What price did he quote you?"

    W - "Only $60,000..."

    H - "OK, but for that price I want it with all the options."

    W - "Great! But before we hang up, something else..."

    H - "What?"

    W - "It might look like a lot, but I was reconciling your bank account and..... I stopped by the real estate agent this morning and saw the house we had looked at last year. It's for sale!! Remember? The one with a pool, English Garden, acre of park area, beachfront property."

    H - "How much are they asking?"

    W - "Only $450,000 - a magnificent price...and I see that we have that much in the bank to cover..."

    H - "Well, then go ahead and buy it, but just bid up to $420,000. OK?"

    W - "OK, sweetie...Thanks! I'll see you later!! I love you!!!"

    H - "Bye...I love you too..."

    The man hangs up & closes the phone's flap. The other men are looking
    him in astonishment and derision. The husband raises his hand while
    holding the phone and asks "Does anyone know who this phone belongs

  3. T3RBO

    T3RBO 6th Gear

  4. ajmackie

    ajmackie Member

    lol to both of them!
  5. LMAO /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh_roll.gif

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