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TODAYS THOUGHTS FROM MIW

Discussion in 'Jokes, Games & Humour' started by miw615, Aug 19, 2013.

  1. miw615
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    miw615 Member

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    Advertisement In Shop:
    Guitar, for sale........ Cheap........
    .......no strings attached.


    Ad. In Hospital Waiting Room:
    Smoking Helps You Lose Weight....
    One Lung At A Time!


    On a bulletin board:
    Success Is Relative.
    The more The Success,
    The more The Relatives.


    When I Read About The Evils Of Drinking....
    I Gave Up Reading


    My Grandfather Is Eighty
    And Still Doesn't Need Glasses....
    He Drinks Straight Out Of The Bottle.


    Sign In A Bar:
    'Those Of You Who Are Drinking To Forget,
    Please do Pay In Advance.'


    Sign In Driving School:
    If Your Wife Wants To Learn To Drive,
    Don't Stand In Her Way....


    Behind Every Great Man,
    There Is A Surprised Woman.


    The Reason Men Lie Is Because
    Women Ask too Many Questions.


    Getting Caught
    Is The Mother Of Invention.


    Laugh And The World Laughs With You,
    Snore And You sleep Alone


    The Surest Sign
    That Intelligent Life Exists
    Elsewhere In The Universe
    Is The Fact That It Has Never Tried To Contact Us.


    Sign At A Barber's Shop :
    We Need Your Heads To Run Our Business..


    Sign In A Restaurant:
    All Drinking Water In This Establishment
    Has Been Personally Passed By The Manager.........Really !!


    #1

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