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Stupid Car Names

smee Apr 2, 2007

  1. smee

    smee Member

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    To follow on from Smitch's thread regarding the fact that people give their cars names. How about some of the stupid names which manufacturers give cars??

    I for one would not be seen dead in either a Misubishi Carisma :puke2: or a Skoda Superb :wtf:

    Anybody got any other suggestions of sad or misguided names?
     
  2. smitch

    smitch Active Member

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    Nissan Qashqai.

    What's that all about??????
     
  3. batwad

    batwad Member

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    SsangYong Kryon is my favourite ludicrously named car, shortly followed by the Rexton.
     
  4. AndyMac

    AndyMac Moderator Staff Member Moderator

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    Toyota Picnic
    "Yes of course long journeys are a breeze in the picnic"
    "pound for pound my Picnic will see off most of the other people carriers on the market, it came top in the Which guide in both blandness and dullness"

    I always liked the baby Puma they used to do - the Ford Weasel
     
  5. benw123

    benw123 Moderator

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    Another good new one is the Kia Cee'd. A car name with an apostrophe! Whatever will they think of next? Ampersand??? ("&")
     
  6. Lowlife

    Lowlife German Hardcore

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    Don't forget the Kia Pride! Who could have pride on one of those!...
     
  7. benw123

    benw123 Moderator

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    How about the Honda Legend? Or - great one this - the Mitsubishi Carisma??? Oh, the irony!!!
     
  8. Caesium

    Caesium My BM is fixed! VCDS Map User

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    The Reliant Kitten always makes me laugh
    BMW cocked up with the X5, I understand they wanted to make an M version but can't because Mazda own the MX5 name, shame.
     
  9. Sinny71

    Sinny71 S55 LKS

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    Here are a few from japan;

    Daihatsu Applause.
    Daihatsu Cube. Not a bad name, considering that this car is pretty much a box with wheels.
    Daihatsu Move. I should hope so.
    Daihatsu Naked. A mini-SUV ("one box") very popular among the ladies, who generally freak out when I tell then what it means.
    Daihatsu Rugger. I guess the upholstery is a key sales point?
    Honda Acty. At least they didn't call it "Seizey".
    Honda Joy Machine. For a the slightest fraction of a second I had this confused with the Hitachi Magic Wand.
    Honda Life. If you have 1,800,000 yen to spare, you too can get a Life!
    Honda Mysterious Utility. Indeed.
    Honda Stepwgn. "wgn" is pronounced "wagon", of course.
    Honda Street. Where exactly are you supposed to drive a Street?
    Honda That's. How can a relative pronoun be a name? (I think it might be a play on words for "zatsu", as in "zatsuyou" - capable of many different tasks.)
    Mazda Bongo. Pretty hard to beat that. Har!
    Mitsubishi Bravo Exceed. Car or giant robot?
    Mitsubishi Canter Guts. A light freight truck.
    Mitsubishi Delica. The name would be slightly less hilarious on a car that wasn't a turbocharged diesel, 4WD behemoth van, complete with a full-steel bumper / rambar that looks like it could give a brick wall a run for its money.
    Mitsubishi Fighter Mignon. Some kind of play on words? Is this supposed to be the filet mignon of trucks or something? I don't think I need to mention that "mignon" means "dainty" in French. Oh, the woes of randomly combining foreign languages...
    Mitsubishi Pajero. According to Mitsubishi, "Named after a mountain cat that inhabits the Patagonia plateau region in southern Argentina." Unfortunately, it's also a minimal pair for "Pakero", "one who masturbates". I think it was renamed to Montero or something for foreign markets, but they still make new Pajeros in Japan, including the Pajero Jr. and the Pajero Mini.
    Mitsubishi Starion. According to rumour, was supposed to be "Stallion".
    Mitsubishi Super Great FP-R Ultra-Economical Motorway Tractor. A very heavy freight truck. It had to be big to fit the name on it.
    Mitsubishi Toppo. How many clowns will fit in the trunk?
    Nissan Homy. I wouldn't try driving this through the 'hood.
    Nissan Sunny. No, it's not solar powered...
    Nissan Vanette. At least it is a minivan, so this kind of makes sense.
    Suzuki Every.
    Subaru Impreza Gravel Express. This mini-SUV wagon, well known for its offroad abilities, can now handle gravel!
    Toyota Coaster. "To move without power", or "a defunct CD" - take your pick.
    Toyota Comfort. Actually, it is pretty comfortable. If you've ever been to Japan, you've see this car -- it's the standard taxi. It's also the car you use to take your road test.
    Toyota Picnic. A 7-passenger utility wagon... that's a damn big picnic. From the pamphlet: "When it comes to the cabin space, it's a joy for claustrophobic."
    Toyota Starlet. A wannabe performer? (Actually, I have one, it's not too bad. Update: Before leaving Japan, I sold my Starlet. Three years of hard driving on a 1992 vehicle, with only a burnt-out headlight and one bad wheel bearing. Better than any north american car I have ever owned. What kept this out of the world market? Maybe the name.) Yamaha Vino. A motor scooter. Do you have to get loaded to drive it?
     
  10. AndyMac

    AndyMac Moderator Staff Member Moderator

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    I think my wife's got a Honda "Joy Machine" - bloody reliable as well.
     
  11. Sinny71

    Sinny71 S55 LKS

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    I think most women have "joy machine's" tucked away somewhere..!! :)
     
  12. smee

    smee Member

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    Hijack alert :busted_cop:

    Back to topic. How about the Hyundai pony?
     
  13. Sinny71

    Sinny71 S55 LKS

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    Ok, point taken, back to topic.

    Suzuki Whizkid (I think it was a suzuki) or more recently, a Ford probe :wtf:
     
  14. joost

    joost Active Member

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    Nissan did a special edition(?) of the Micra called the Wave :wtf: . Then there's the Isuzu Big Horn (Trooper to you and me) and the Mitsubishi T-Box (say it quickly!)
     
  15. Geordie Mike

    Geordie Mike Yeee-haw

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    Or the suzuki cappucino from a few years back. Even had cappucino written the length of it's side.
     
  16. Sinny71

    Sinny71 S55 LKS

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    Nissan did a Nissan Cedric and a Nissan Gloria. His and Hers versions of the same car.

    One that baffles me is the Rover Streetwise..????? Nothing Wise about it.
     
  17. AndyMac

    AndyMac Moderator Staff Member Moderator

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    Love that car - take a Rover 25 and stick bits of a plastic dustbin to it to give it that rugged look, then jack the suspension up for that all important off road look.
     
  18. Caesium

    Caesium My BM is fixed! VCDS Map User

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    [​IMG]

    I must agree with you there Andy, what a pile of **** this is.
     
  19. Rich

    Rich Rollin on boost mother hubbards

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    rofl @ that Rover. Deary me.
     
  20. Caesium

    Caesium My BM is fixed! VCDS Map User

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    Looks like it did a ramraid on the early learning centre
     
  21. treblesykes

    treblesykes Member

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    My mateflew in from abroad hired a superb from the local airport went to visit his brother, who said he had never heard of a super B before
     
  22. Biglockie

    Biglockie Aye you know it makes sense

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    Seems to be a pattern here, Mostly japenese cars with daft names, is it due to the translation?? or are just given daft names to wind up the rest of the world???
    (this thread LOL)
     
  23. Sinny71

    Sinny71 S55 LKS

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    Here's an italian one to add to the mix...alfa quattrofoglio verde..!!

    I'm pretty sure thats a pizza though ???
     
  24. smee

    smee Member

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    And what about good old Vauxhall with their "Enjoy" trim level?

    Dont know if I would like driving around in a Vauxhall Agila Enjoy!?!
     
  25. Bash_A3

    Bash_A3 Member

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    hmm I think its abd enough to name a car Octavia, but a friend of a friend decided to name their new-born daughter after it..
     
  26. madvw

    madvw Active Member

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    boo, beaten to it!!
     
  27. smee

    smee Member

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    I agree that naming kids after cars is a bit strange. One of my sons mates is called Karmann :think:
     
  28. joost

    joost Active Member

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    Mate of mine's called Marcos - he's actually a member on here but doesn't log on very often. His loss...
     
  29. smitch

    smitch Active Member

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    Well, i'm seeing a girl at the mo who's little girl is called Sunny.

    Nothing to do with Nissan i hope!!!
     
  30. Caesium

    Caesium My BM is fixed! VCDS Map User

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    I was working in Stevens vauxhall near broadbridge heath some time ago and they had a poster (several actually) advertising the new Vauxhall Zafria, I asked the salesman what a Zafria was and he told me it was a new people carrier, I said isn't that the Zafira? he said it was, so I pointed to the poster and then he twigged, they'd had it up like that for months.
     
  31. silver75

    silver75 Big Ron

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    Very interesting.
     
  32. AndyMac

    AndyMac Moderator Staff Member Moderator

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    What about the best named car?
    Has to be Dodge Viper for me.
     
  33. Caesium

    Caesium My BM is fixed! VCDS Map User

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    Veyron...
     
  34. batwad

    batwad Member

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    Best named: Senator
     
  35. Caesium

    Caesium My BM is fixed! VCDS Map User

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    Stag
     
  36. smee

    smee Member

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    Acclaim :think:
     
  37. Caesium

    Caesium My BM is fixed! VCDS Map User

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    herald
     
  38. smitch

    smitch Active Member

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    Dodge Charger sounds pretty cool. :cool:
     
  39. Caesium

    Caesium My BM is fixed! VCDS Map User

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    Jenson Interceptor?
     
  40. smitch

    smitch Active Member

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    I always thought Mercedes B class sounds a bit sub standard.
     

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