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Single woman

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by necroeire, Oct 20, 2005.

  1. necroeire
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    necroeire Active Member

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    A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected:
    - 2 litres of low fat milk
    - Carton of eggs
    - 2 litres of orange juice
    - Head of lettuce
    - Half a dozen tomatoes
    - 500g jar of coffee
    - Loaf of bread,
    - ...and a 250g pack of bacon.
    As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier.

    While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, "You must be single."
    The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her eight items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her
    marital status.

    Curiosity getting the better of her, she said "Well, you know what, you're absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?"

    The drunk replied, "Cos you're ugly."
    #1
  2. jojo
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    jojo S3 Drift King! Staff Member Moderator

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    PMSL /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cry.gif
    #2
  3. jdp1962
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    jdp1962 Grumpy Old Moderator Staff Member Moderator

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    LOLOLOL!!! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cry.gif
    #3
  4. Soupie69uk
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    Soupie69uk Owner

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    Nice!!
    #4
  5. hop2407
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    hop2407 Active Member

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    Mint.... /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cry.gif
    #5
  6. TDI-line
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    TDI-line Uber Post Whore

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    Brilliant.
    #6
  7. Rallyman
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    Rallyman LPG Abuser & have VAGCOM

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    Nice /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif
    #7
  8. imported_Nigma
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    imported_Nigma Guest

    Got a slight variation of this the other day in my inbox....


    >
    > A girl walks into a supermarket and buys the following items:
    >
    > 1 Bar of Soap
    > 1 Toothbrush
    > 1 Tube of toothpaste
    > 1 loaf of bread
    > 1 pint of milk
    > 1 apple
    > 1 banana
    > 1 orange
    > 1 plum
    > 1 grapefruit
    > 1 tomato
    > 1 lettuce
    > 1 cabbage
    > 1 baking potato
    > 1 Kraft single
    > 1 samosa
    > 1 vegetable pakora
    > 1 muesli bar
    > 1 pie
    > 1 frozen pizza
    > 1 single frozen dinner
    >
    > The bloke behind her in the queue taps her on the shoulder. He is
    > carrying a basket with a six pack of Stella, a pizza and some Wagon
    > Wheels.
    >
    >
    > As she turns he smiles at her and says, "Single, eh?"
    >
    >
    > The girl smiles sheepishly and replies, "How did you guess?"
    >
    >
    > He looks at her - straight in the eyes and gently says, "Because
    > you're minging."
    >
    #8
  9. CJ A4
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    CJ A4 Active Member

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    HAHAHAHA /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cry.gif
    #9

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