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Open Letter to the Previous Owner

Discussion in 'General Automotive Chat' started by TheButtonz, Mar 15, 2011.

  1. TheButtonz
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    TheButtonz Member

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    [Mar 15, 2011]
    Hi

    Please post similar messages here...
    #1
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  3. TheButtonz
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    TheButtonz Member

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    [Mar 15, 2011]
    [FONT=Arial, sans-serif]Open letter to the previous owner of my car. (tongue firmly in cheek)[/FONT]


    [FONT=Arial, sans-serif]Hello[/FONT]


    [FONT=Arial, sans-serif]I don't know you and you don't know me. That doesn't matter. I'm sure you are enjoying your new car. I've owned your car for a couple of years now, and can safely say that I am happy that you decided to sell it to get that 4x4 you bought. I hope you are enjoying this car now, and it has boded you well.[/FONT]


    [FONT=Arial, sans-serif]Having said all this, I do have some general questions for you. I appreciate that you may not recall taking some of these decisions, but even so I hope that you understand my reasons for asking.[/FONT]


    [FONT=Arial, sans-serif]1. When you took the decision to adjust the lights on the car, did you decide to de-couple the adjusters, and secure the lights with blu-tac? This would of course be an acceptable temporary fix, but you and I both know that this was in no way temporary. Both lights have this solution, and both lights have never been right. Sometimes I wonder if I should have looked closer, but then I have checked many online forums and none of them suggest to check for blu-tac in the light lens.[/FONT]


    [FONT=Arial, sans-serif]2. When you adjusted the door cards, why did you secure them with wood screws? This one I just can't understand. Why, why, why did you decide to re secure the door cards with wood screws, even apparently drilling fresh holes for them. You did a good job, I will hand it to you, but I am still puzzled as to why you chose wood screws, instead of all the other screws in the world.[/FONT]


    [FONT=Arial, sans-serif]3. When you fitted your new, smaller number plate did you (again) use wood screws to secure the number plate to the car? I've spent many nights wondering about this question. I've owned many motorbikes, and these need to have number plates secured firmly, with colour coded screws, so they don't blow off. But on cars, simple sticky fixers are normally sufficient. You however decided that this wasn't going to be good enough. Big, silver, wood screws were all that would be sufficient for you, and you went ahead and screwed these in good and proper. Having said that, I have since tried to do some work on the bumper and it is hard to get behind there, so maybe bolts would have been too much, but even still I, again, can't understand why you used wood screws.[/FONT]


    [FONT=Arial, sans-serif]4. Why did you insist on using a touch up pen on the car? Whatever scratches you thought were unsightly enough to warrant this pen, you have essentially applied highlighter to about 15 places on the car. I'm somewhat grateful for the focus this brings, as it makes it easy to clean, but I am always left with a car with every scratch highlighted. Thanks.[/FONT]


    [FONT=Arial, sans-serif]5. How did you manage to damage every alloy wheel? The sexy 18" alloy wheels are what drew me to this car, but how did you manage to damage each wheel so badly? I can only assume that you damaged the front wheels, then when the tyres where changed, you switched them with the back wheels and damaged them as well. I'm not sure whether to be impressed or let down, but either way it's a mystery.[/FONT]


    [FONT=Arial, sans-serif]6. How did you manage to break BOTH front seats? BOTH! I just can't envisage a scenario where you would break both. One would be understandable, but both? Really? It just doesn't make sense. How did you live with it for all that time? It wound me up immensely.[/FONT]


    [FONT=Arial, sans-serif]7. Why did you not service the car for approximately 30,000 miles? You obviously spent a lot of money on the seats (I assume that you did have some recaro seats in there as I can see the bracket holes) and the speakers (you left the wiring in) and the wheels, but not £200 for the odd service? Not even so much as an oil change?[/FONT]


    [FONT=Arial, sans-serif]Whatever the above means, I am still grateful, as I feel like I have rescued this little 13 year old car, dusted it off (the inside was filthy by the way, and I found the ashtray - it was wedged under the seat so this went straight back in) and am happy with the way it is coming along.[/FONT]


    [FONT=Arial, sans-serif]I am also fortunate to have met a great bunch of people on audi-sport.net, most of which I am sure you will never know existed.[/FONT]


    [FONT=Arial, sans-serif]Hopefully, one day you will see me drive by and say ''I used to own a car like that'' but will then look back at your 4x4 car and sigh.[/FONT]


    [FONT=Arial, sans-serif]Thanks[/FONT]


    [FONT=Arial, sans-serif]Martin[/FONT]
    #2
  4. hades-
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    hades- Yorkshire & Humber Rep. Regional Rep VCDS Map User

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    [Mar 15, 2011]
    maybe he was a joiner
    #3
  5. JS1500
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    JS1500 Howdy

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    [Mar 15, 2011]
    Dear previous owner,

    I have your Rod Stewart CD.
    #4
  6. MURRAYS444
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    MURRAYS444 Member

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    [Mar 15, 2011]
    That was a brilliant read, restrained anger and sarcasm comes to mind, it’s amazing what lengths some people do to make a car look good it, thanks to sites like ASN and the people that use it help you with how your car works!
    #5
  7. reptor245
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    reptor245 Active Member

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    [Mar 15, 2011]
    Lame letter. You should have looked more closely before you bought. Remember kids, its upto YOU to inspect before you moan....
    #6
  8. S3KO4
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    S3KO4 Member

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    [Mar 15, 2011]
    good write up. did you sign a note saying sold as it is seen? no complaints at later dates.. how many previous owners!
    #7
  9. KB
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    KB Member

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    [Mar 15, 2011]
    Haha thats quality.
    #8
  10. TheButtonz
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    TheButtonz Member

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    [Mar 16, 2011]
    It is all meant as a joke. :)

    At the time, I was urgently in need of a car and for the price (£1500) it was somewhat of a bargain. I still love the damn thing, and I probably wouldn't have been able to afford it if it didn't have the issues.

    Other than the obvious marks etc it seemed pretty sound, but whenever I do anything to the car, I always find some sign of a weird bodge job.

    I'm no expert on cars, and this forum has helped me greatly, and I'm not complaining as it was sold as seen but it's more of a chance for me to vent.

    One last thing I forgot - one of the previous 6 owners broke the caliper guide pin on the NS wheel hub. Instead of replacing it, they glued it in...
    #9
  11. mk1chopper
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    mk1chopper Missing the S3

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    [Mar 16, 2011]
    I had a friend who had a 1.4 westcoast saxo when they first came out (T reg), he would drive it around town every night god knows how many miles he put on that car, he fitted it out with ice, had it lowered, changed the back box, spent alot of money on it, but never had it serviced. Makes me laugh these boy racers who modify their cars but dont know how they work or anything about basic maintenance or keeping the car serviced.
    #10
  12. s3 Hoggy
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    s3 Hoggy Whats going on???

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    [Mar 16, 2011]
    I'm a joiner and I havn't felt the need to use wood screws on my car
    #11
  13. mk1chopper
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    mk1chopper Missing the S3

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    [Mar 16, 2011]
    what about no nails?
    #12
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  14. Westy
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    Westy Double Dark Side! Diesel & 8P

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    [Mar 16, 2011]
    I'd love to ask the previous owner of mine wtf happened to the passwenger side as it's been resprayed. Also whether he had dogs in the boot! I spent a good year after buying the car hoovering dog hairs out the boot carpet!
    #13
  15. S3 TAM
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    S3 TAM Pocket now empty

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    [Mar 16, 2011]
    Westle you didn't buy it from this fellow, did you?

    [​IMG]
    Last edited: Mar 16, 2011
    #14
  16. Westy
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    Westy Double Dark Side! Diesel & 8P

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    [Mar 16, 2011]
    Haha. I dread to think what he was doing in boot then!
    #15
  17. steve bain
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    steve bain Member

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    [Mar 16, 2011]
    I want to add a few notes to the owner of my car here too.

    1. Why did you feel the need to secure the front bumper with wood screws?

    2. Why did lose the cars entire service history? (or lack of?)

    3. where the hell is the users manual?

    4. When you used the tools from the boot, why not just put them back?

    5. Why did you replace the bose speakers with 'upgrade' ones, yet again fixed in with woodscrews - which puncture the speaker grill - did you not notice?

    6. where the hell is the ashtray?

    7. where the hell is the glovebox?! and door card pockets?

    8. did you get an industrial box of zip ties for your birthday? i guess so as most stuff in the engine is held in with it?

    9. why was the DV fitted back to front?

    10. why spray alloys matt black when they have 'chunks!' missing out of them!

    11. why fix door cills in place with superglue? which didn't work and now i have to replace ddor seals and cills for the sake of a few pence of clips?!

    12. wheres the stereo gone?

    13. where is the battery clamp? how long has it been sliding around for?

    14. where did you get your mot done? because clearly i need to go there next year to get it through! bald tyres, knackered bushes etc

    15. and why when YOU wrote the car off did you forget to mention it to me when i bought it?
    #16
  18. [Dave B]
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    [Dave B] Daddy

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    [Mar 16, 2011]
    Dear previous owner,

    Thanks for the car, I love it.

    I hope you enjoy your new boxster you massive gaylord.

    Best regards,
    Dave.

    P.s. You only get a C- for your washing technique but at least you tried.
    #17
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  19. jb0o
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    jb0o North East Forum Moderator Regional Rep Site Sponsor VCDS Map User

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    [Mar 16, 2011]
    Dear Previous owner,


    Why did you feel the need to tell me that you were getting rid of your A3 because your parents were getting a divorce and you needed money to move out.

    I checked your private reg (that I handed back over to you) a couple of months after to find it was registered to a Focus ST.

    Why lie? You could have told me you hated the piece of ****; I still would have bought it.

    Jonny.
    #18
  20. mk1chopper
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    mk1chopper Missing the S3

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    [Mar 16, 2011]
    Dear Previous Owner

    Why did you get your mate at Audi to stamp the service book but not have a service done by Audi, oh and lie about having the cambelt changed, good job I checked the service history with Audi and didnt end up with a snapped cambelt, just wish i'd checked before I took it off your hands.
    #19
  21. sportstractor
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    sportstractor Chugger

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    [Mar 16, 2011]
    Hahaha funny, I thought mine was a relative shitter compared to your guys car, when infact mines a specimen example lol.

    Dear previous owner

    You forgot to mention that my car was featured in dogging monthly... Sweet!

    Also I found your love letter to your 'partner'.... You goon

    Cheers then
    #20
  22. steve bain
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    steve bain Member

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    [Mar 16, 2011]
    just some more:

    dear previous owner.

    you left lots of smoking bits and bobs and a BIG bag of weed in the tray under the drivers seat. thanks. and some brand new timberland boots in the boot. thanks. and a shed load of viagra in the locked glove box which he claims to 'have never been able to open'. not so thanks....

    oh yeah, the cambelt and water pump were not changed by the previous owner. so which one of you lied?

    I still love my pink car though...
    #21
  23. auroan
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    auroan Active Member

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    [Mar 16, 2011]
    Dear last owner;

    Thanks for looking after the A4, servicing it on time and keeping std.

    Auroan.
    #22
  24. Dilligaf-UK
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    Dilligaf-UK Chugging along

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    [Mar 16, 2011]
    Dear Previous Owner,


    Thank you for all the extras you fitted to the car before you "lost" it to the Finance Company (that my mate works for, so I got for substantially less than you still owe on it!!), like the Jetex Exhaust, the 19" RS6 Rep Wheels, Spacers and even the fantastic ReMap you had done, not to mention the new clutch, coil packs and MAF!!!!

    However, why did you really think it was necessary to stash 2lbs of Dry Dog Food loose under the Back Seat you total ****??? Did you think that the Finance Company would be affected by it? Took me ages to find the source of the smell you Breast....

    Thanks and regards


    The Bloke that bought the car that you'll still be paying off for the foreseeable.
    #23
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  25. skol
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    skol broken down

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    [Mar 17, 2011]
    Dear previous owner,

    Why did you leave a huge blob of vaseline in the ashtray? surely leaving it in the tin would have better for everyone!

    Why has the oil cap been replaced by a temporary fuel cap, which has resulted in little bits of plastic breaking off down in there?

    Lots of love,

    John
    #24
  26. GeneralWest
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    GeneralWest Member

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    [Mar 17, 2011]
    Dear previous owner,
    Thank you very, very much for buying the car before me. Then paying for a service, cam belt and water pump change, new thermostat, a new set of engine covers and dipstick tube. Then realising you couldn't afford the insurance and selling the car to a trader for £1000 less than you'd paid for it 3 weeks earlier and buying a 1.3 Fiesta. I got a bargain. Next time round it might be good idea to get a quote BEFORE you buy a car. If you ever see me on the road make yourself known and I'll buy you a drink.
    #25
  27. ScottD3
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    ScottD3 I want your faulty electronics Supporter

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    [Mar 18, 2011]
    Cracking thread.

    Nice one lads.
    #26
  28. ScottD3
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    ScottD3 I want your faulty electronics Supporter

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    [May 8, 2013]
    On this damp and cooler day I feel this thread deserves a bump and some more entries.
    #27
  29. s3clarke
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    s3clarke Money grabbing s3!

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    [May 8, 2013]
    you cant buy a used car for cheap then moan about it.. I don't get it.. :huh:
    #28
  30. Zak0123
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    Zak0123 Active Member

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    [May 8, 2013]
    Hahahahahahahaha
    #29

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