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Helpdesk humour......

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by hop2407, Apr 15, 2005.

  1. hop2407

    hop2407 Active Member

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    Some oldies but some are new too!!!

    Helpdesk: What kind of computer do you have?
    Customer: A white one...

    ******
    Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.
    Helpdesk: Have you tried pushing the button?
    Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.
    Helpdesk: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note .."
    Customer: No .. wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet.. it's still on my desk... Sorry...

    ******
    Helpdesk: Click on the 'my computer' icon on the left of the screen.
    Customer: Your left or my left?

    ******
    Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you?
    Male customer: Hello... I can't print.
    Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and...
    Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill
    Gates!

    ******
    Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says it can't find it...

    ******
    Customer: I have problems printing in red...
    Helpdesk: Do you have a color printer?
    Customer: Aaaah..................Thank you.

    ******
    Helpdesk: What's on your monitor now ma'am?
    Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.

    ******
    Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
    Helpdesk: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
    Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer
    Helpdesk: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
    Customer: Okay.
    Helpdesk: Did the keyboard come with you?
    Customer: Yes.
    Helpdesk: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another
    keyboard?
    Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah..that one does work!

    ******
    Helpdesk: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, and the number 7.
    Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?

    ******
    A customer couldn't get on the Internet:
    Helpdesk: Are you sure you used the right password?
    Customer: Yes I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
    Helpdesk: Can you tell me what the password was?
    Customer: Five stars.

    ******
    Helpdesk: What anti-virus program do you use?
    Customer: Netscape.
    Helpdesk: That's not an anti-virus program.
    Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet explorer.

    ******
    Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has put a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears!

    *******
    And the winner is...

    Helpdesk: How may I help you?
    Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.
    Helpdesk: OK, and, what seems to be the problem?
    Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get
    the circle around it?
     
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  3. W8 Performance

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    Quality, sent it to our IT Manager, he may get some answers!!!
     
  4. TDI-line

    TDI-line Uber Post Whore

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    They are some top quality lines. /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh_2.gif /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh_2.gif

    [​IMG]
     
  5. hop2407

    hop2407 Active Member

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    [ QUOTE ]
    Quality, sent it to our IT Manager, he may get some answers!!!

    [/ QUOTE ]

    Nice..... /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif
     

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