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Best Short Joke Award

Discussion in 'Jokes, Games & Humour' started by jdp1962, Aug 21, 2006.

  1. jdp1962

    jdp1962 Grumpy Old Moderator
    Staff Member Moderator Audi S4

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    A three-year-old boy was examining his testicles while taking a bath.

    "Mum," he asked, "are these my brains?"


    "Not yet," she replied.
     
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  3. Olly_K

    Olly_K Administrator

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    rofl !
     
  4. Caesium

    Caesium My BM is fixed!
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    LMFAO!!!
     
  5. skanky

    skanky Member

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    best short joke? how about "a (dyslexic) man walks into a bra.." :)
     
  6. jdp1962

    jdp1962 Grumpy Old Moderator
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    :laugh:
     
  7. Dan Gliballs

    Dan Gliballs Active Member

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    Celine Dion walks into a bar.

    Barman says "So why the long face?"
     
  8. OutLore

    OutLore VOIP Dude

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    A skeleton walks into a bar and asks for a pint of beer, and a mop.
     
  9. silver75

    silver75 Big Ron

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    and 1st prize goes to...
     
  10. TTdriver

    TTdriver Guest

    There was a bloke that watched Dispatches the other week........................
     
  11. james0808

    james0808 Active Member

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    A man walks into a bar "AARRRRGGGHHH" it was an iron one.
     
  12. joost

    joost Active Member

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    Woman walked into a bar and asked for a double entendre so the barman gave her one. :tumble:
     
  13. silver75

    silver75 Big Ron

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    .
     
  14. phantom photon

    phantom photon New Member

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    Two elephants walk off a cliff
    Boom Boom
     
  15. Smithzer14

    Smithzer14 New Member

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    Did you hear about the blind circumciser
    He got the sack!

    :p :p :p
     
  16. Smudge973

    Smudge973 Member

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    What's the most common kind of owl in the UK ?

    A teat Owl.

    Boom Boom
     
  17. S4_dan

    S4_dan Fire up the Quattro!
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    Why is it not a good idea to sleep with a dyslexic dwarf??


    'cos its not big and its not clever!
     
  18. silver75

    silver75 Big Ron

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    whats green and turns red at the flick of a switch?



    A frog in a liquidiser
     
  19. hop2407

    hop2407 Active Member

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    All good ones...
     
  20. Smudge973

    Smudge973 Member

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    Did you hear about the IRA terrorist send to London to blow up a bus....
    He burnt his mouth on the exhaust pipes.
     
  21. MikeA3

    MikeA3 Active Member
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    how does bob marley like his donuts?


    wi jammin
     
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  23. fingermouse

    fingermouse thats me

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    little jimmy gets lost ina shop and the assistant asks "what your mum like"








































    big cocks and bacardi breezers miss
     
  24. TDI-line

    TDI-line Uber Post Whore

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    God these are aweful.:yes:
     
  25. silver75

    silver75 Big Ron

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    BMW 1 Series :haha:
     
  26. silver75

    silver75 Big Ron

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    Two leppers are playing cards..
    One threw his hand in and the other laughed his head off
     
  27. timps

    timps Shakersville

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    WhatÂ’s brown and sticky?














    A stick
     
  28. TDI-line

    TDI-line Uber Post Whore

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    That is class Timps.
     
  29. JGrant1285

    JGrant1285 Sir Scouser Benitez

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    Whats green and hangs from trees??




    Giraffe snot....sorrrry!!!
     
  30. Olly_K

    Olly_K Administrator

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    2 drums and a cymbol fell off a cliff.....
    boom-boom-tish !
     
  31. Mart

    Mart Active Member

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    Why was the condom flying around the room??



    It was pissed off!
     
  32. MarcA3Turbo

    MarcA3Turbo Member

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    Whats green and smells like pork?


    Kermits finger.
     
  33. jdp1962

    jdp1962 Grumpy Old Moderator
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    One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very
    sexy nightie. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want."

    So he tied her up and went for a game of golf.
     
  34. rickquattro

    rickquattro Member

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    Whats black, shiney and sails the seven seas?

    Binbag the sailor.....
     
  35. Geordie Mike

    Geordie Mike Yeee-haw

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    What's blue and f*cks grannies?

    Hypothermia
     
  36. S3Si

    S3Si Member

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    Two fish in a tank, one says to the other "how do you drive this thing?"
     
  37. Adams3

    Adams3 Member

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    Two snakes, one says to the other 'are we poisonous'??

    The other says 'i dont know, why?'

    He says 'coz i just bit my lip'
     
  38. Adams3

    Adams3 Member

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    Two flies sitting on a dog sh*t.

    One fly says to the other 'Havent seen you for a while,where have you been?'

    He says 'oh ive been on the sick'.
     
  39. Geordie Mike

    Geordie Mike Yeee-haw

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    What's grey, sits at the end of the bed taking the piss?

    Kidney dialysis machine
     
  40. A11 EAF

    A11 EAF Member

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    Wots white and can't climb trees?


    A fridge.
     
  41. A11 EAF

    A11 EAF Member

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    Wot's the definition of nasal sex?


    F*$k nose.
     
  42. Just Plain Old

    Just Plain Old Active Member

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    Man visits the zoo, there was only one dog there.........

    It was a shitzu...!
     

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