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Best Short Joke Award

Discussion in 'Jokes, Games & Humour' started by jdp1962, Aug 21, 2006.

  1. jdp1962
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    jdp1962 Grumpy Old Moderator Staff Member Moderator

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    A three-year-old boy was examining his testicles while taking a bath.

    "Mum," he asked, "are these my brains?"


    "Not yet," she replied.
    #1
  2. Olly_K
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    Olly_K Administrator

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  3. Caesium
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    Caesium My BM is fixed!

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    LMFAO!!!
    #3
  4. skanky
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    skanky Member

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    best short joke? how about "a (dyslexic) man walks into a bra.." :)
    #4
  5. jdp1962
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    jdp1962 Grumpy Old Moderator Staff Member Moderator

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    :laugh:
    #5
  6. Dan Gliballs
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    Dan Gliballs Active Member

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    Celine Dion walks into a bar.

    Barman says "So why the long face?"
    #6
  7. OutLore
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    OutLore VOIP Dude

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    A skeleton walks into a bar and asks for a pint of beer, and a mop.
    #7
  8. silver75
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    silver75 Big Ron

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    and 1st prize goes to...
    #8
  9. TTdriver
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    TTdriver Guest

    There was a bloke that watched Dispatches the other week........................
    #9
  10. james0808
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    james0808 Active Member

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    A man walks into a bar "AARRRRGGGHHH" it was an iron one.
    #10
  11. joost
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    joost Active Member

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    Woman walked into a bar and asked for a double entendre so the barman gave her one. :tumble:
    #11
  12. silver75
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    silver75 Big Ron

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    .
    #12
  13. phantom photon
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    phantom photon New Member

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    Two elephants walk off a cliff
    Boom Boom
    #13
  14. Smithzer14
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    Smithzer14 New Member

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    Did you hear about the blind circumciser
    He got the sack!

    :p :p :p
    #14
  15. Smudge973
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    Smudge973 Member

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    What's the most common kind of owl in the UK ?

    A teat Owl.

    Boom Boom
    #15
  16. S4_dan
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    S4_dan Fire up the Quattro!

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    Why is it not a good idea to sleep with a dyslexic dwarf??


    'cos its not big and its not clever!
    #16
  17. silver75
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    silver75 Big Ron

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    whats green and turns red at the flick of a switch?



    A frog in a liquidiser
    #17
  18. hop2407
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    hop2407 Active Member

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    All good ones...
    #18
  19. Smudge973
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    Smudge973 Member

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    Did you hear about the IRA terrorist send to London to blow up a bus....
    He burnt his mouth on the exhaust pipes.
    #19
  20. MikeA3
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    MikeA3 Active Member

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    how does bob marley like his donuts?


    wi jammin
    #20
  21. fingermouse
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    fingermouse thats me

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    little jimmy gets lost ina shop and the assistant asks "what your mum like"








































    big cocks and bacardi breezers miss
    #21
  22. TDI-line
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    TDI-line Uber Post Whore

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    God these are aweful.:yes:
    #22
  23. silver75
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    silver75 Big Ron

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    BMW 1 Series :haha:
    #23
  24. silver75
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    silver75 Big Ron

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    Two leppers are playing cards..
    One threw his hand in and the other laughed his head off
    #24
  25. timps
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    timps Shakersville

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    WhatÂ’s brown and sticky?














    A stick
    #25
  26. TDI-line
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    TDI-line Uber Post Whore

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    That is class Timps.
    #26
  27. JGrant1285
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    JGrant1285 Sir Scouser Benitez

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    Whats green and hangs from trees??




    Giraffe snot....sorrrry!!!
    #27
  28. Olly_K
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    Olly_K Administrator

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    2 drums and a cymbol fell off a cliff.....
    boom-boom-tish !
    #28
  29. Mart
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    Mart Active Member

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    Why was the condom flying around the room??



    It was pissed off!
    #29
  30. MarcA3Turbo
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    MarcA3Turbo Member

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    Whats green and smells like pork?


    Kermits finger.
    #30
  31. jdp1962
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    jdp1962 Grumpy Old Moderator Staff Member Moderator

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    One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very
    sexy nightie. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want."

    So he tied her up and went for a game of golf.
    #31
  32. rickquattro
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    rickquattro Member

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    Whats black, shiney and sails the seven seas?

    Binbag the sailor.....
    #32
  33. Geordie Mike
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    Geordie Mike Yeee-haw

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    What's blue and f*cks grannies?

    Hypothermia
    #33
  34. S3Si
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    S3Si Member

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    Two fish in a tank, one says to the other "how do you drive this thing?"
    #34
  35. Adams3
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    Adams3 Member

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    Two snakes, one says to the other 'are we poisonous'??

    The other says 'i dont know, why?'

    He says 'coz i just bit my lip'
    #35
  36. Adams3
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    Adams3 Member

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    Two flies sitting on a dog sh*t.

    One fly says to the other 'Havent seen you for a while,where have you been?'

    He says 'oh ive been on the sick'.
    #36
  37. Geordie Mike
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    Geordie Mike Yeee-haw

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    What's grey, sits at the end of the bed taking the piss?

    Kidney dialysis machine
    #37
  38. A11 EAF
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    A11 EAF Member

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    Wots white and can't climb trees?


    A fridge.
    #38
  39. A11 EAF
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    A11 EAF Member

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    Wot's the definition of nasal sex?


    F*$k nose.
    #39
  40. Just Plain Old
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    Just Plain Old Active Member

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    Man visits the zoo, there was only one dog there.........

    It was a shitzu...!
    #40

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