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Best chat up line ever???

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by Ads, Jun 23, 2010.

  1. Ads
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    Ads License to drive

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    I heard it on a TV show a few weeks ago. It's funny, clever and, most importantly, not cheesy.

    So, may I present you with the best chat up line ever (imho)............



    You walk up to the person of your choice and say: "Do you know how much a Polar Bear weighs?"

    They more than likely say: "No"

    You say: "Neither do I, but it broke the ice"

    :hi:
    #1
  2. Ads

    Ads

    [Nov 28, 2014]

  3. JD09
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    JD09 I'm not modding, I'm improving VCDS Map User

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  4. Ads
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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    LOL!!!

    Would you like me to break it down for you?? :lmfao:

    A Polar Bear lives in a very cold environment.............

    Forget it. :happy:
    #3
  5. JD09
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    JD09 I'm not modding, I'm improving VCDS Map User

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    That's a tumble weed. i.e. the chat up line was **** ;)

    Haha.
    #4
  6. Ads
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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    Yeah yeah. You just didn't get it. :huh:

    It's already earned me three shags since Thursday! (See, so good it works in dreams too!!!).
    #5
  7. JD09
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    JD09 I'm not modding, I'm improving VCDS Map User

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    The polar is heavy enough to break the ice, which is also a term to start a conversation with the random fitty you want to shag, yeah yeah, I get it lol.

    It's an old un my friend ;)

    (just out of interest, you know everyone has an age in mind for people off forums, how old are you?).
    #6
  8. Ads
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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    You calling me immature?? lol!

    Put it this way.... I'm old enough to remember the '86 world cup. Which I'm guessing took place before you were born???
    Can't remember the '82 one though.
    #7
  9. JD09
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    JD09 I'm not modding, I'm improving VCDS Map User

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    Not at all, just always interested! Most people I think are 7 are actually 70 and vice versa!

    I'm 23, so not quite ;)
    #8
  10. jojo
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    jojo Looking for Boost! Staff Member Moderator

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    Clearly one for the ladies, but it has no effect on MEN! :)
    #9
  11. Ads
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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    I'm young enough to be excited by video sunglasses. ;)

    I'm 33 mate. Still got my own teeth though.
    #10
  12. ALPINE
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    ALPINE Yes its diesel, now cry u lost

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    i asked the fit polish girl next door if she had any English in her, she replyed no, so i asked her if would like some.

    bom bom! :sorry:
    #11
  13. Ads
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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    :happy:
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  14. NHN
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    NHN Retrofitter - Audi - VW - Skoda - Seat Site Sponsor VCDS Map User

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    Keep going mate, get 1 VD for each day of the week lmfao
    #13
  15. Ads
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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    :tocktock:


    And I said shags... not slags. :lmfao:

    (is that word allowed on here?)
    #14
  16. Gops
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    Gops 6th gear @7000rpm

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    This always works for me...
    "excuse me... feel this.. (points at my top material) Can you feel it..?"
    Woman - "yeahh.?"
    Me - "You know what this is?"
    Woman - "What is it?"
    Me - "It's boyfriend material!" (Woman smiles.. convo starts... happy days!)
    #15
  17. Gops
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    Gops 6th gear @7000rpm

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    Or.. See a girl in the club... Get her attention by looking at her EYES, and as she looks back, call her over with your little finger... when she comes.. say to her... "I just made you COME with my little finger!" haha
    #16
  18. Gops
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    Gops 6th gear @7000rpm

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    Or when talking to a girl for some time and she says.."im waiting for Mr right" tell her.. "im not mr right, but im Mr Right-now!" :p
    #17
  19. Gops
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    Gops 6th gear @7000rpm

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    I could go on for days and i expect a mod will tell me off for the constant posts! - sorry got carried away
    #18
  20. jojo
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    jojo Looking for Boost! Staff Member Moderator

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    Gops you TART! :laugh:
    #19
  21. lil_coz
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    lil_coz Active Member

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    I'm liking that one! lol
    #20
  22. Gops
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    Gops 6th gear @7000rpm

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    Hehehe ;)
    #21
  23. Sarah's A3
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    Sarah's A3 MODERATOR V6 S3 Hybrid Staff Member Moderator

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    OMG!!! dont say these chat up lines actually work! No Way haa haa..... keep trying....
    #22
  24. jojo
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    jojo Looking for Boost! Staff Member Moderator

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    I know what works on you Sarah.... 'Want a beer luv?' :laugh:
    #23
  25. Sarah's A3
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    Sarah's A3 MODERATOR V6 S3 Hybrid Staff Member Moderator

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    haa haa make it a pint! lol
    #24
  26. smudge_don
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    smudge_don Active Member

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    :lmfao:
    #25
  27. Watty
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    Watty ..... (_!_) Sarah's A3s #1 Fan

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    Or, I just say to Sarah, when she's going up to the bar...'Make mine a large one', then she gives me a flash of flesh and wahay, instant 'Eric'
    #26
  28. Sarah's A3
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    Sarah's A3 MODERATOR V6 S3 Hybrid Staff Member Moderator

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    I dont go up to the bar lol, you dont have a dog and bark yourself!!! haa haa
    #27
  29. ALPINE
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    ALPINE Yes its diesel, now cry u lost

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    [Jun 23, 2010]
    baaaahahahaaaa!! well said luv.
    #28
  30. sidibear
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    sidibear Looking for Zombies !! Staff Member Moderator

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    [Jun 25, 2010]
    There you go, fixed :beerchug:
    #29
  31. jojo
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    jojo Looking for Boost! Staff Member Moderator

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    [Jun 25, 2010]
    :laugh:
    #30
  32. Ads
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    [Jun 25, 2010]
    So kind. :friends:
    #31
  33. a3_dan
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    a3_dan Member

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    [Jun 25, 2010]
    I wouldn't call this a chat up line, but I have tried this before, surprisingly though it hast worked...yet.


    Walk up to a bird, pull her by her arm and just say, "you'll do"
    #32
  34. Ads
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    [Jun 25, 2010]
    Nothing wrong with that approach if you ask me. Women expect too much these days.
    #33
  35. Sarah's A3
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    Sarah's A3 MODERATOR V6 S3 Hybrid Staff Member Moderator

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    [Jun 25, 2010]
    :lmfao: not bad tbh! Least she would know where she stands!
    #34
  36. Gops
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    Gops 6th gear @7000rpm

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    [Jun 26, 2010]
    Or a cheesy one.. "I've seen you before?...
    Woman - "Where??"
    Me - "I can't put my finger on it... but i know i have.."
    (At this point if she says, really? where abouts... then its a chance it'll work, if not move onto her friend!)
    Me - "thats it!!! I saw you in my dreams last night...!" :p
    #35
  37. Gops
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    Gops 6th gear @7000rpm

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    [Jun 26, 2010]
    Or one my cousin told me... wave your hand as if your calling somebody.. but wave it near your face... if she comes over.... keep waving and say... "tis abit hot in here!" hahaha she'll laugh and then the polar bear has broken the ice! :p
    #36
  38. Gops
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    Gops 6th gear @7000rpm

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    [Jun 26, 2010]
    Or just ask her what her interests are.. Who she beee with? Pleased to make her smile..? so what numbers to dial? Is she gonna be here for a while, just call your crew, she can call her crew and you randevous at the bar around 2?!
    #37
  39. Gops
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    Gops 6th gear @7000rpm

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    [Jun 26, 2010]
    Or a good one when she says "you just want sex?" say.. "im not banging im just trying to relocate between your legs!" :p hehehe
    #38
  40. Gops
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    Gops 6th gear @7000rpm

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    [Jun 26, 2010]
    You lot want more?
    #39
  41. jojo
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    jojo Looking for Boost! Staff Member Moderator

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    [Jun 26, 2010]
    You've pulled mate.
    #40

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