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Arnold schwarzebadger

Discussion in 'A3/S3/Sportback (8P Chassis)' started by quattro81, Jul 15, 2011.

  1. quattro81

    quattro81 All the gear.. No idea

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    So..... Last night I gave my friend a lift home.. I pulled out onto the A2 dual carriageway near my house.. My car was still cold, so I was accelerating gently and doing about 55mph.... At this point what can only be described as "the badgernator" appeared in front of me! It was lying right in the middle of the road on an unlit stretch and as I had a car in the lane next to me I could not swerve. I hit the brakes but still went over it. The "bang" it made was unbelieveable.. Straight away my car starts making a donk donk donk noise, so I stop and we have a look.
    Now get this, my car is lowered on h&r springs and that front splitter is looooooow, but somehow it hasn't touched any of that at all! There are no marks or damage visible anywhere, other than a lot of blood on the underneath of my exhaust.. Nothing hanging down, nothing appears bent or broken. The emissions warning light came on and has stayed on since, and the donk noise gets more frequent the faster you go, so I limped the car about a mile back to my house.
    It's got no vibration, doesn't drive or steer differently and the noise is still there whether in gear, neutral or reverse......
    Hoping it's a shield or something simple, but starting to worry.. I'm now waiting for the rac to come and take a look, or recover it to my garage for me :(
    Look out for Arnold scwarzebadger on the roads, he will mess your s*** up!
     
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  3. phil76

    phil76 Active Member

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    Wouldnt it make a big difference with general running if it had damaged wiring of one of the 02 sensors or maybe a boost pipe,is it a rotational noise with the vehicle moving or is it doing it just ticking over etc?
     
  4. Gti Jazz Blue

    Gti Jazz Blue Active Member
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    Cat core loose in the exhaust ?
     
  5. quattro81

    quattro81 All the gear.. No idea

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    That's the weird thing.. No trouble ticking over or revving at all. It's definitely a rotational noise that speeds proportionately up as I go quicker.. Can't work it out!? The emissions control warning light is confusing me...
     
  6. S3RYE

    S3RYE Interior Next!!

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    Mate I hit a badger recently, they are like tanks!!! So fecking fat and hard!!! Fortunately just knocked my bonnet out of alignment... But the BANG was Unbelievable!!
     
  7. jbs2472

    jbs2472 Active Member

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    Just off subject where abouts are you Quattro as you mentioned the A2 and i am in Medway.
     
  8. phil76

    phil76 Active Member

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    Could it have damaged back edge of one of your alloys maybe? sounds daft i know and embarrassing for me to ask but is it a wheel flat spot ?,dont know what else to suggest really as you say its a very strange one,please keep us update for future badger hunters problems
     
  9. L1 HCS

    L1 HCS Active Member

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    My uncle was driving his toyota corolla thru some lanes in rural wales (many moons ago) and along comes one of the ancestors of the badgernator, he (my uncle) had no choice but to try and drive through it... but it got jammed in between the engine and all that.. R.I.P. both car and badge. Uncle was fine. :iagree:with S3RYE, badgers are solid fkrs!
     
  10. Ash187

    Ash187 Audi-Retrofits.co.uk
    Site Sponsor Gold Supporter VCDS Map User Audi A5 quattro

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    +1
    I'm near dartford
     
  11. Ads

    Ads License to drive

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    How big are these badgers then???
    I usually aim at wildlife on roads as the popping noise when driving over them sounds like a balloon bursting which reminds me of when I used to blow up balloons for a living, and that brings a smile to my face.

    However, if these badgers are hard as fook as pointed out I'll make sure I only drive through them when in a rental.

    Thanks for the heads up guys.
     
  12. quattro81

    quattro81 All the gear.. No idea

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    Canterbury chaps.. Rac man scratching his head/earhole/elbow as we speak... My other mate hit one just round the corner from my house a couple of weeks ago... In his TRD celica, ripped the front splitter off! They're out to get us I tell thee:sadlike:
     
    #11 quattro81, Jul 15, 2011
    Last edited: Jul 15, 2011
  13. Ads

    Ads License to drive

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    I've always said that badgers are to$$ers!
     
  14. quattro81

    quattro81 All the gear.. No idea

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    Lol.. Thanks Ads, that's massively prejudiced, but makes me feel a little better...
     
  15. antmax7

    antmax7 Member

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    off topic is your mate on celica club??????
    black obviously seen as its a TRD.
    never hit a badger but pheasants are hard as fook too i hit one a at 60mph in my van it has dented my bonnet and smashed my head light!
    it's a bloody deep dent aswell
     
  16. danb986

    danb986 In awe of VCDS

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    Had the same thing happen to me on the A41 at about 80 one day. I can only assume he ducked when he saw me coming but then stood up again too soon as the front splitter which was quite low was fine, but it completely destroyed the back bumper :think:

    Anyway, back to your problem. It can't be brakes or you'd feel it through vibration, same with driveshafts I would've thought. Unless its something to do with the caliper as this doesn't spin, but could be getting hit by a moving part I suppose. But this wouldn't put on an emmissions light. No, I'm baffled. :shrug: sorry.


    Any news from the RAC man?
     
  17. Ads

    Ads License to drive

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    That's funnier than you'll ever know. :lmfao:
     
  18. S3RYE

    S3RYE Interior Next!!

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    +1
     
  19. paddy

    paddy Audi=No fault code, no idea

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    Sounds like he pulled the wires off the ABS and got his scull caught between the disc and the brake caliper :).......Cyclist do that as well if you hit em hard enough.
     
  20. quattro81

    quattro81 All the gear.. No idea

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    So I reckon badgers do the "duck under the splitter tactic" too then... Rac man thinks propshaft , but they're recovering it to Audi for a better look over..
     
  21. quattro81

    quattro81 All the gear.. No idea

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    Well, car has gone off on lorry :crying: they're gonna give me some vauxhall piece to drive til I get her back.. No one seems to have any clue as to why the emissions warning light is on as yet? Puzzling
     
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  23. NCRAW

    NCRAW Member

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    Try hitting a full size Kangaroo then the badger would be just a fart in the wind!! Been lucky so far, touch wood, but seen it happen to friends and family. Not nice!!
     
  24. Ads

    Ads License to drive

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    Maybe the badger farted in shock when he saw you hurtling towards him.
     
  25. quattro81

    quattro81 All the gear.. No idea

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    #23 quattro81, Jul 15, 2011
    Last edited: Jul 15, 2011
  26. Ads

    Ads License to drive

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  27. quattro81

    quattro81 All the gear.. No idea

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    I think me and my mate both farted simultaneously when we hit the badger.. Thats probably it ...?:fart:
     
  28. quattro81

    quattro81 All the gear.. No idea

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    Err.. Did that link work ok? I did it from my iPad ....
     
  29. Ads

    Ads License to drive

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    FAILfunction mate.
     
  30. NHN

    NHN Retrofitter - Audi - VW - Skoda - Seat
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    Anything wrapped around a shaft somewhere, possible damage to cat/sensor looms, only 1 way to find out.

    Feel sad for the badger tbh, constantly seeing animals on roads, very sad indeed.
     
  31. quattro81

    quattro81 All the gear.. No idea

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    Rats! Poxy pseudo-semi mobile imitating piece of junk apple device
     
  32. quattro81

    quattro81 All the gear.. No idea

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    I agree , there's been loads of roadkill around recently ... Not good
     
  33. Gti Jazz Blue

    Gti Jazz Blue Active Member
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    Hmmm BBQ :shutup2:
     
  34. quattro81

    quattro81 All the gear.. No idea

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    try that vid now ads... probably a massive anticlimax, but hey ho...
     
  35. paddy

    paddy Audi=No fault code, no idea

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    Works for me ! most kanga's just do a std type jump but that one seems to have aerobatics down to a Tee :)
     
  36. voorhees

    voorhees Moderator
    Staff Member Moderator Team Brill Red Black Edition

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    I hit one at sixty and it shuffled back into the hedge,I got a picture of him....
    [​IMG]
     
    RedDejavu, quattro81 and paddy like this.
  37. quattro81

    quattro81 All the gear.. No idea

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    Ok. So I found out exactly what Arnold did to my car...... He knocked the transmission tunnel heat shield loose?.. Cost a grand total of £240 including labour... Just goes to show how strong audis are my car properly leapt up in the air when I went over it, so this is minor damage as far as I'm concerned! The garage said there was "a ridiculous amount of blood" under my car and asked if there were any missing persons in my area!?!?!!
     
  38. Ash187

    Ash187 Audi-Retrofits.co.uk
    Site Sponsor Gold Supporter VCDS Map User Audi A5 quattro

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    wow! i always had a dodgy feeling about Canterbury... always knew something was not quite right about that place... too quiet and 'nice'
    :ninja:
     
    #36 Ash187, Jul 19, 2011
    Last edited: Jul 19, 2011
  39. quattro81

    quattro81 All the gear.. No idea

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    Lol..don't wear those shoes of yours down here ever mate.. You'll get run over just for them in my neck of the woods!:p
     
  40. Ads

    Ads License to drive

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    Haha... shame to your brain!
     
  41. Ash187

    Ash187 Audi-Retrofits.co.uk
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    u fool its "shame on your name cos your names too lame!" G3 :moa:
    playground cusses :p
     
  42. Ads

    Ads License to drive

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    I guess you went to a lame school then. With a lame playground. And lame pupils. :lmfao:
     

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