Chris NottJMB Retrofits
Results 1 to 2 of 2

Thread: Aussie builders

  1. #1
    1st Gear

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    north west
    Posts
    120

    Aussie builders

    Two Aussie builders (Phil and Eric) are seated either side of a table in a rough pub when a well-dressed man enters, orders a beer and sits on a stool at the bar. The two builders start to speculate about the occupation of the suit.

    Phil: - I reckon he's an accountant.
    Eric: - No way - he's a stockbroker.
    Phil: - He ain't no stockbroker! A stockbroker wouldn't come in here!

    The argument repeats itself for some time until the volume of beer gets the better of Phil and he makes for the toilet. On entering the toilet he sees that the suit is standing at a urinal. Curiosity and the several beers get the better of the builder.

    Phil: - 'Scuse me.. No offence meant, but me and me mate were wondering what you do for a living?
    Suit: - No offence taken! I'm a Logical Scientist by profession.
    Phil: - Oh! What's that then?
    Suit: - I'll try to explain by example... Do you have a goldfish at home?
    Phil: - Er... Mmm . Well yeah, I do as it happens!
    Suit: - Well, it's logical to follow that you keep it in a bowl or in a pond. Which is it?
    Phil: - It's in a pond!
    Suit: - Well then it's reasonable to suppose that you have a large garden
    Phil: - As it happens, yes I have got a big garden!
    Suit: - Well then it's logical to assume that in this town if you have a large garden then you have a large house?
    Phil: - As it happens I've got a five-bedroom house...built it myself!
    Suit: - Well given that you've built a five-bedroom house it is logical to assume that you haven't built it just for yourself and that you are quite probably married?
    Phil: - Yes I am married, I live with my wife and three children.
    Suit: - Well then it is logical to assume that you are sexually active with your wife on a regular basis?
    Phil:- Yep! Four nights a week!
    Suit: - Well then it is logical to suggest that you do not masturbate very often?
    Phil: - Me? Never.
    Suit: - Well there you are! That's logical science at work!
    Phil: - How's that then?
    Suit: - Well from finding out that you had a goldfish, I've told you about your sex life!
    Phil: - I see! That's pretty impressive...thanks mate!

    Both leave the toilet and Phil returns to his mate.

    Eric: - I see the suit was in there. Did you ask him what he does?
    Phil: - Yep! He's a logical scientist!
    Eric: - What's that then?
    Phil: - I'll try and explain. Do you have a goldfish?
    Eric: - Nope.
    Phil: - Well then, you're a ****er...
    18"rs4s
    votex body kit
    full leather heated seats
    Rnse
    full electrics
    parking sensors
    auto dimming lights and mirrors
    full bose system
    cruise con
    sports pack

  2. # ADS
    ADS
    Join Date
    Always
    Location
    Global
    Posts
    Many
     
  3. #2
    jwhat's Avatar
    3rd Gear

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Ireland
    Posts
    524

 

 

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO

Garage Plus, Vendor Tools vBulletin Plugins by Drive Thru Online, Inc.

Content Relevant URLs by vBSEO