Dave The Rooster
Dave the rooster
A farmer wanted to have his hens serviced, so he went to the market looking for a rooster. He was hoping he could get a special rooster, one that would service all of his many hens and when he told this to the market vendor, the vendor replied: "I have just the rooster for you. Dave here is the horniest rooster you will ever see!"
So the farmer took Dave back to the farm. Before setting him loose in the hen house though, he gave Dave a little pep talk. "Dave", he said, "I'm counting on you to do your stuff". And without a word he strutted into the hen house.
Dave was as fast as he was furious, mounting each hen like a thunderbolt. There was much squawking and many feathers flying, till Dave had finished having his way with each hen. But Dave didn't stop there, he went in to the barn and mounted all the horses, one by one and still at the same frantic pace. Then he went to the pig pen, where he did the same. The farmer, watching all of this with disbelief, cried out, "Stop, Dave, you'll kill yourself". But Dave continued, seeking out each farm animal in the same manner.
Well the next morning, the farmer looked out and saw Dave lying on his lawn. His legs were up in the air, his eyes rolled back, and his long tongue hanging out. A buzzard was already circling above.
The farmer walked up to Dave saying, "Oh you poor thing, look what you did, you've gone and killed yourself. I warned you little buddy".
"Shhhhh," Dave whispered, "The buzzard's getting closer."