Little Patrick asked for a bike for his birthday. His dad said 'We'd like to get you one, but our mortgage is Ł80,000 and your Mum has lost her job'.

The next morning Patrick walked out with his suitcase packed, his Dad asks 'Where are you going son?'

Patrick replied, 'I walked past your room last night & heard you tell Mum you were pulling out, then I heard Mum tell you to wait because she was coming too! So I'm not staying here on me own with an Ł80,000 mortgage and no ****ing bike', he says!