Best Short Joke Award

jdp1962

jdp1962

Grumpy Old Man
Joined
May 26, 2003
Messages
10,274
Reaction score
4,611
Points
113
Location
Northumberland
A three-year-old boy was examining his testicles while taking a bath.

"Mum," he asked, "are these my brains?"

"Not yet," she replied.
 
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Celine Dion walks into a bar.

Barman says "So why the long face?"
 
A skeleton walks into a bar and asks for a pint of beer, and a mop.
 
There was a bloke that watched Dispatches the other week........................
 
Woman walked into a bar and asked for a double entendre so the barman gave her one. :tumble:
 
What's the most common kind of owl in the UK ?

A teat Owl.

Boom Boom
 
whats green and turns red at the flick of a switch?



A frog in a liquidiser
 
Did you hear about the IRA terrorist send to London to blow up a bus....
He burnt his mouth on the exhaust pipes.
 
how does bob marley like his donuts?


wi jammin
 
Two leppers are playing cards..
One threw his hand in and the other laughed his head off
 
2 drums and a cymbol fell off a cliff.....
boom-boom-tish !
 
Why was the condom flying around the room??



It was ****** off!
 
One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very
sexy nightie. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want."

So he tied her up and went for a game of golf.
 
Two fish in a tank, one says to the other "how do you drive this thing?"
 
Two snakes, one says to the other 'are we poisonous'??

The other says 'i dont know, why?'

He says 'coz i just bit my lip'
 
Two flies sitting on a dog sh*t.

One fly says to the other 'Havent seen you for a while,where have you been?'

He says 'oh ive been on the sick'.
 
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