Sky InsuranceMonster Motorsport
Results 1 to 26 of 26
  1. #1
    silver75's Avatar
    Big Ron

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    at work
    Posts
    3,243

    Unhappy Getting married!! :(


    I was a very happy person. My wonderful girlfriend and I had been going out for over a year, and so we decided to get married.
    There was only one little thing bothering me ... it was her beautiful younger sister.
    My prospective sister-in-law was twenty-two, wore very tight miniskirts, and generally was braless.
    She would regularly bend down when she was near me, and I always got more than a pleasant view. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else.

    One day "little" sister called and asked me to go over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived, and she whispered to me that she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. Well, I was in total shock, and couldn't say a word.

    She said , "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want one last wild fling, just come up and get me."

    I was stunned and frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled off her knickers and threw them
    down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and made a beeline straight to the front door. I opened the door, and headed straight towards my A3.

    Lo and behold, my entire future family was standing outside, all clapping! With tears in his eyes, my father-in-law hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test..... we couldn't ask for better man for our daughter. Welcome to our family!!!"

    And the moral of this story is:

    Always keep your condoms in your car.
    Last edited by silver75; 30th October 2006 at 12:43.

    Smart Roadster 03
    Ford Sportka 05

  2. # ADS
    ADS
    Join Date
    Always
    Location
    Global
    Posts
    Many
     
  3. #2
    Olly_K's Avatar
    Administrator

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Jun 2000
    Posts
    2,643
    ROFL !

  4. #3
    MikeA3's Avatar
    5th Gear

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Epsom
    Posts
    1,176
    quality

  5. #4
    Booth_S4's Avatar
    Riding on V8 power

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Newcastle, Staffs
    Posts
    657
    is this true or just tripe!! quality though!!!
    German iz ze vay forvard!
    Made with vorspung durch tecnik

    2003 Noggy S4 Avant - 344bhp of pure V8 muscle

  6. #5
    marriedblonde's Avatar
    Moderator

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Sunny South Coast
    Posts
    4,368
    An oldie but a goldy
    Married and blonde yes, but still a guy with a poor taste in usernames!

    Mercedes Benze E-class 350 sport convertable, black, pacha grey leather, 19" AMG rims, HK stero and a few more toys
    VW Scirocco 2.0Tsi GT with Revo stage 2, evoms induction kit, lowered, short shift, miltek
    BMW 330 Coupe M sport Black, Black leather, Nav and a lot of other options.
    BMW Z4 Coupe Sport in black with a few toys - going friday and gonna be missed by my lad.
    A3 2.0Tdi S-Line DSG. Gone but not forgotten

  7. #6
    L1 HCS's Avatar
    6th Gear
    Candy Tetris Champion, Mahjong Champion, Magic Ball Champion

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    cymru
    Posts
    4,597
    OMG!!!! LOL!!! that was sooo funny!!!!
    "Swallow your pride occasionally, it's not fattening." - Frank Tyger
    "Avoid making irrevocable decisions while tired or hungry." - Robert Heinlein

  8. #7
    Michalis's Avatar
    Neutral

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Nicosia, Cyprus
    Posts
    37
    very funny

  9. #8
    L1 HCS's Avatar
    6th Gear
    Candy Tetris Champion, Mahjong Champion, Magic Ball Champion

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    cymru
    Posts
    4,597
    hilarious!!!! can't stop laughing!!!
    "Swallow your pride occasionally, it's not fattening." - Frank Tyger
    "Avoid making irrevocable decisions while tired or hungry." - Robert Heinlein

  10. #9
    Adams3's Avatar
    2nd Gear

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Hertfordshire
    Posts
    407
    Works well with the inclusion of an Audi, makes it that much more believable lol


    1999 AUDI S3 | AMD STAGE 2 REMAP | MILTEK CAT BACK EXHAUST | VIPER DIVERTER VALVE | EBC TURBO GROOVE DISCS | RED STUFF CERAMIC PADS | 18" RS6 REPLICA ALLOYS | ANDYMAC 'BOSE' UPGRADE.

  11. #10
    Rev-head's Avatar
    6th Gear

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Perthshire
    Posts
    2,954
    very good
    Urq RR
    S2 Coupe...RS2 +
    S2 Avant (slipper wagon spec)
    A4 AVANT TDI

  12. #11
    jojo's Avatar
    S3 Drift King!

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    Solihull, Midlands
    Posts
    24,848
    Top stuff LOL


    99' Audi S3(APY) - Brilliant Black Click>>>Going Sideways vid!
    You've got to have a laugh!



  13. #12
    Soupie69uk's Avatar
    Owner

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Edinburgh, Scotland
    Posts
    2,698
    Great joke
    A4 1.8T Quattro, FMIC, Coilovers, B&M short shift, 312mm Brakes, Stage 4 clutch, Awe Gauge, Uprated antiroll bars, plus more bits. Pics Here

  14. #13
    raymie's Avatar
    6 pot AP

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    gourock
    Posts
    700
    luv it
    scooby for now

    RS4 next

  15. #14
    marmite's Avatar
    Counting the Tesco Club points

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Barnet
    Posts
    1,070
    very funny
    Audi RS6 Daytona GreyLoving all 455.7BHP of her

  16. #15
    Peloton's Avatar
    2nd Gear

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    354
    lol excellent!
    2000 Audi S3

  17. #16
    fallmonk's Avatar
    Turbo Sport

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Glesga,home of the rain god!
    Posts
    1,836
    Class mate ,
    had me going to the punch line
    I bought a convertable in the wettest country in the world who says Scotsmen dont have a sense of humour !

    "Lets fire up the Quattro" DCI Gene hunt,,,,,,,ashes to ashes

  18. #17
    rickparmar's Avatar
    va va voom

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Leicester
    Posts
    2,269
    excellent
    ~ ~ ~2003 Audi S3 BAM ~ Ming Blue ~ 18" BBS Alloys ~ Heated Black Leather ~ Forge DV ~ RNS-E ~ denison ipod link~ parrot mk6100 bluetooth ~ ~ ~

    Still need Remap

    2007 Audi S3 8L
    2005 Audi A3 1.6 sport grey with climate control
    2003 Audi A3 1.6 sport black without climate contol

  19. #18
    DIPS_A4's Avatar
    SEAT LEON CUPRA R (225)

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Leicester
    Posts
    566
    LOL GOOD 1!

  20. #19
    JamS3's Avatar
    6th Gear

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Location
    Stockton-on-Tees
    Posts
    2,248
    Quote Originally Posted by Booth_S3
    is this true or just tripe!! quality though!!!

    Thats nearly as funny as the joke!!!
    NOW - Audi S3 Facelift - Sprint Blue, RNS-E Sat Nav, SDS, Bluetooth Phone Prep, Bose, Cruise, Buckets, FBMFSW, Adaptive Lights, Int Light Pack, Tyre Pressure Monitor, Piano Black Inserts, Through Load, Auto Dim RV Mirror/Wing, Auto Wipers/Lights, Folding Door Mirrors, Heated Seats, Ipod Dock, Front Arm Rest, Rear/Front Parking Sensors, 1st Aid Kit, Rear Arm Rest, H + R Springs, Front 15mm Spacers, Rear 10mm Spacers.

  21. #20
    Caesium's Avatar
    My BM is fixed!

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Hertfordshire
    Posts
    4,857
    You could have slipped 1 in her balloon knot, no need for wetsuit then....

  22. #21
    TDI-line's Avatar
    Uber Post Whore

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Peterborough
    Posts
    8,883
    What a tease.

    2013 AUDI A3 SB S-LINE : 2.0 TDIQ 184 : GLACIER WHITE :
    : S-TRONIC : COMFORT PACK : SD SAT NAV : FOLDING MIRRORS : HEATED SEATS: RIGID BOOT LINER :

  23. #22
    hop2407's Avatar
    5th Gear

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Derbyshire
    Posts
    1,408
    Quote Originally Posted by A4Quattro
    You could have slipped 1 in her balloon knot, ....
    What a quality comment PMFSL - Whilst blowing balloons up at my kids next party..... "Dad - what are you laughing at"...
    Hop
    ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    '97 A4TS, Aqua/Green.
    Remap: 210 bhp (154 kW). 228lb/ft @ 1 Bar. Bailey DV30.


  24. #23
    Caesium's Avatar
    My BM is fixed!

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Hertfordshire
    Posts
    4,857
    hehehehe!! rofl!

  25. #24
    1st Gear

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    298
    Quote Originally Posted by hop2407
    What a quality comment PMFSL - Whilst blowing balloons up at my kids next party..... "Dad - what are you laughing at"...
    Now that is a quality comment!! PMSL

  26. #25
    Caesium's Avatar
    My BM is fixed!

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Hertfordshire
    Posts
    4,857
    gLAD I BROUGHT SOME SMILES TO PEOPLE'S FACES

  27. #26
    Caesium's Avatar
    My BM is fixed!

    Status
    Offline
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Hertfordshire
    Posts
    4,857
    ooops caps....

 

 

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO

Garage Plus, Vendor Tools vBulletin Plugins by Drive Thru Online, Inc.

Content Relevant URLs by vBSEO