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  1. #1
    jdp1962's Avatar
    Grumpy Old Man

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    A Moment of Pure Comedy Gold

    Forgive me for sharing a personal moment with you all, but something happened today that made me laugh so much, I nearly lost control of my bladder. First some background.

    About 18 months ago, I was deliriously happy in my job, a highly-motivated, specialist performer in a specialist field of dispute resolution in financial services. I was on a decent salary, with lots of share options and 20 years' continuous service in a final-salary pension scheme.

    Then, a new senior manager was appointed in charge of our department. For someone whose role was 90% people management, he was utterly devoid of any management, motivational or even basic inter-personal skills. He had the amazing ability to pi$$ off every person he came into contact with, on a daily basis. For me personally, he was a particular disaster, because he decided the departmental roles should not be specialised, but everyone should all do little bits of everything. It would have meant the gradual erosion of a service delivery system for a key external stakeholder (& a very high profile stakeholder at that) that I had developed over ten years. It would have severely damaged the company's reputation with said stakeholder, and left me with a nothing job.

    Almost a year ago to the day, I resigned out of the blue and took up a new job with the afore-mentioned external stakeholder, with whom my personal reputation was still pretty high. This caused massive consternation among the departmental directors, and when they asked why I was leaving, I gave it to them straight. (Well, after all, they'd appointed the tw@t!)

    When the directors did a bit more digging, they realised it wasn't just me whose life he was making a misery, but in fact he was a total incompetent. They set about "performance-managing" him out of the company. I continued to get bit of information fed to me from time to time by old friends, and in August, I heard that he'd resigned himself, just before he was due to be given the final push.

    In retrospect, he probably did me a favour. Although the move cost me a massive cut in income, I'm happier in the new job than I could ever have imagined. The pressure levels are miniscule, stress is non-existent, and the professional standards very high indeed. I was still delighted the little fcuker had left, though, LOL!

    Sorry about the tedious build-up, but that's the background to today, when I had lunch with half a dozen of my old colleagues. I asked them what the latest gossip was from the old place. Someone said "Apparently, whatsiname has got a new job."

    "Anyone know what's he doing?", I asked.

    Various vague looks, then one guy looked up & said:"He's the safety office at an oil depot in Hertfordshire."



    [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cry.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cry.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cry.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cry.gif[/img]

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  3. #2
    6th Gear

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    Re: A Moment of Pure Comedy Gold

    Excellent JDP ain't paypack a *****!!! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cry.gif[/img]

  4. #3
    28v6
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    Re: A Moment of Pure Comedy Gold

    Wanna Do it again?? I'm going through the same thing at the mo...Arrrgggh!!! [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/ok.gif[/img] [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/beerchug.gif[/img]

  5. #4
    easytease's Avatar
    cheesypeas

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    Re: A Moment of Pure Comedy Gold

    is this true, or partially true? i still [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/swear.gif[/img] me self [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

  6. #5
    jdp1962's Avatar
    Grumpy Old Man

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    Re: A Moment of Pure Comedy Gold

    [ QUOTE ]
    is this true, or partially true? i still [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/swear.gif[/img] me self [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

    [/ QUOTE ]

    Every word is true. I cannot tell you how good it made me feel.

  7. #6
    dummi's Avatar
    smoking a6

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    Re: A Moment of Pure Comedy Gold

    lol, my mate is laughing that is same as his story , the oil depot safety officer bit is too much [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/lol.gif[/img]

  8. #7
    Moderator

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    Re: A Moment of Pure Comedy Gold

    Excellent!

  9. #8
    hop2407's Avatar
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    Re: A Moment of Pure Comedy Gold

    Fookin brilliant Jeff...... A punchline I never saw coming......absolutely PMFSL.......

 

 

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