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Thread: Schlongs..

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    Schlongs..

    I've just worked out that I must have Colombian blood in me.


    (Note - The measurements are in centimeters)..


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    Brilliant! Saw this on Frank Skinner show, and the female equivalent showing breast size.

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    lmfao only you lmfao

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    lol, and theres me thinking you were from China lol!!!!!!


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    Quote Originally Posted by NHN View Post
    lmfao only you lmfao

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sarah's A3 View Post
    lol, and theres me thinking you were from China lol!!!!!!
    Further to mikey's post, where are you from Sarah???


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    Russia matey im pleased to say!!!


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    Quote Originally Posted by Sarah's A3 View Post
    Russia matey im pleased to say!!!




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    lol, you nutter! theres been loads of me on here before now as you know!


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    How many guys would actually be honest though!!

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    I reckon the Mexican and the Canadians stand by the US Border with this sign:

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    Quote Originally Posted by mikeyg View Post
    How many guys would actually be honest though!!
    You know what they say mate - it's not the length - girth FTW! lol
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    Isnt it the ones with less girth that say that to throw others off the scent! (no pun intended)

    Its not all about size!!! Its what you do with it that counts!!!!!!!


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    Quote Originally Posted by Welly View Post
    You know what they say mate - it's not the length - girth FTW! lol
    Yeah whatever, Stumpy!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sarah's A3 View Post
    Isnt it the ones with less girth that say that to throw others off the scent! (no pun intended)
    Meh. It's all good
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    Quote Originally Posted by aythree View Post
    Yeah whatever, Stumpy!
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    What was it that Mike Reid said....

    Some woman asked him to give her 12 inches and make her bleed.
    So he gave her what he had twice and punched her in the nose.

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    lol


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    Quote Originally Posted by aythree View Post
    What was it that Mike Reid said....

    Some woman asked him to give her 12 inches and make her bleed.
    So he gave her what he had twice and punched her in the nose.
    Long may he live on in infamy. Brilliant.
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    i dont believe the womans one. most women i know are a d or above.

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    Quote Originally Posted by DaveA3 View Post
    i dont believe the womans one. most women i know are a d or above.
    Where the hell do you live - and can I move there?
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    Quote Originally Posted by Welly View Post
    Where the hell do you live - and can I move there?
    milton keynes and yeh sure mate come on down. U can live in my garage :D bring ur tools muwhaha

    seriously tho. im more suprised to see smaller boobs around.

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    And how is it that Russian ladies have massive boobs,but the men have small d***s?

    These poor Russian ladies are not getting a fair deal, im off to help them out!!

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    Big schlongs, small schlongs mean nothing if the women has a hole the size of the tube tunnel.

    Welly, Pop in to La Senza in the summer. What a great site to see.
    I love visting the misses at work.

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    Quote Originally Posted by DaveA3 View Post
    milton keynes and yeh sure mate come on down. U can live in my garage :D bring ur tools muwhaha

    seriously tho. im more suprised to see smaller boobs around.
    A B cup or above is fine. Big waps are great don't get me wrong, but I'd settle for a lovely little arse all day, every day.

    Quote Originally Posted by Axios View Post
    Big schlongs, small schlongs mean nothing if the women has a hole the size of the tube tunnel.
    Epic.

    Quote Originally Posted by Axios View Post
    Welly, Pop in to La Senza in the summer. What a great site to see.
    I love visting the misses at work.
    I may just do that - we have a La Senza and an Ann Summers in Cheltenham. I love going into Ann Summers - everyone in the always looks so awkward.

    Last time I was in there with the missus, there was a mum and 16 maybe year old daughter selecting the best dildo for the daughter! I couldn't believe it.

    One way to avoid teenage pregnancy I guess....
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    Quote Originally Posted by Welly View Post
    A B cup or above is fine. Big waps are great don't get me wrong, but I'd settle for a lovely little arse all day, every day.
    The age old saying, any thing more than a hand full is a waste. Which is true but at the same time, I like the chest of women to look like a womens chest, not a small boy.

    A nice firm rump and legs, Need some nice legs to point to heaven.

    Quote Originally Posted by Welly View Post
    Last time I was in there with the missus, there was a mum and 16 maybe year old daughter selecting the best dildo for the daughter! I couldn't believe it.

    One way to avoid teenage pregnancy I guess....
    Some of the underwear the young girls buy in the misses shop is shocking. The girls never use to wear that sort of thing when I was a teenager.

    She fitted a bra to a 15/16 year old and it was something like a 32 E or something.
    I bet shes popular at school.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Welly View Post
    Last time I was in there with the missus, there was a mum and 16 maybe year old daughter selecting the best dildo for the daughter! I couldn't believe it.

    One way to avoid teenage pregnancy I guess....
    A novel approach!

    As for big boobs, i'm with Welly. I don't like them too big. I'm a legs man though. A girl with a good set of legs is a winner always (usually anyway).


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    [QUOTE=Welly;1224848]A B cup or above is fine. Big waps are great don't get me wrong, but I'd settle for a lovely little arse all day, every day.
    QUOTE]

    One thing i wish my missus had, a cute little arse

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    Quote Originally Posted by mikeyg View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Welly View Post
    A B cup or above is fine. Big waps are great don't get me wrong, but I'd settle for a lovely little arse all day, every day.
    One thing i wish my missus had, a cute little arse
    NEVER let her hear you say that, ha!


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    Quote Originally Posted by Axios View Post
    She fitted a bra to a 15/16 year old and it was something like a 32 E or something.
    I bet shes popular at school.
    At school?! I bet she's bloody popular EVERYWHERE! lol

    Jesus wept, when I was at school, thong was a word that made everyone giggle, and about 2 out of the 200 girls had waps that were even worth acknowledging.

    What happened? I blame 14/15 year old girls going on the pill. Then by 16, BOOM, Houston, we have fun bumps.
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    Quote Originally Posted by crazy88 View Post
    NEVER let her hear you say that, ha!
    Yeah, we have a forum grass amongst us somewhere, which is why I never post up pictures that are too raunchy....

    I will find him....
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    Quote Originally Posted by crazy88 View Post
    NEVER let her hear you say that, ha!
    I do regularly comment on it! I would have hoped she got the hint and did something about it!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Welly View Post
    What happened? I blame 14/15 year old girls going on the pill. Then by 16, BOOM, Houston, we have fun bumps.
    Yup.
    All the birds was worth looking at back in school are now fat with ugly kids and all the ones that was not worth checking out are now amazing, with kids. lol

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    Quote Originally Posted by mikeyg View Post
    I do regularly comment on it! I would have hoped she got the hint and did something about it!
    Hmmmm, I must admit I tell my missus at least three times a week how much I love her bum
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    Quote Originally Posted by mikeyg View Post
    I do regularly comment on it! I would have hoped she got the hint and did something about it!
    Fair point! Mine told me a while back that I was getting a belly so I did something about it. Started cycling a lot more and all is good now

    i'm lucky, my wife is quite small, even after 1 kid, and I think she always will be. I knew I married her for something....it definitely wasn't sex. lol


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    Quote Originally Posted by crazy88 View Post
    I knew I married her for something....it definitely wasn't sex. lol
    The excellent food preparation?
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    Quote Originally Posted by Welly View Post
    The excellent food preparation?
    That was it! Most definitely. And the fact that I was a kept man for years while I finished uni, it was great. She always loaded my account with money. Now we both work we're poorer than before, but i think having a daughter has caused that.


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    Quote Originally Posted by Axios View Post
    The age old saying, any thing more than a hand full is a waste. Which is true but at the same time,
    "Anything more than a handful is a waste" is so far from the mark its unreal!
    If I find that a boob is bigger than what my hand can hold I just use both hands*.













    *and my mouth if there's still a bit left over.

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    Quote Originally Posted by crazy88 View Post
    Fair point! Mine told me a while back that I was getting a belly so I did something about it. Started cycling a lot more and all is good now

    i'm lucky, my wife is quite small, even after 1 kid, and I think she always will be. I knew I married her for something....it definitely wasn't sex. lol
    Im not so lucky my wife needs to get to the gym! Sex can be great....or non existent. Its all or bloody nothing these days! 5 times one week once the next.

    How is a man supposed to know where he stands!!

  41. #40
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    Quote Originally Posted by mikeyg View Post
    How is a man supposed to know where he stands!!
    If in doubt - pop down the local red light district.... lol.

    They're funny blokes these women...
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