Well thanks for the advice guys.
Took an A4 S-Line for a drive (2 days as it was a courtesy car) and loved it; it was refined, had loads of grip, and personally I didn't find the ride too hard at all.
Then I took a 320D SE for a drive... unbelievable. It was so much quieter, steered so sweetly and handled amazingly. You really can appreciate the balance and RWD, even through town. The dash / interior looks awful from outside, but once inside the car it makes perfect sense.
Audi
Looks great
Drives well
Lovely interior
BMW
Looks odd (but I'm getting used to it)
Odd interior (but better than it seems once you're driving)
Drives so much better than the Audi its untrue.
I know a lot of people won't notice the difference, and maybe its because I race motorbikes that I'm more sensitive to some elements of handling (?!) but I've ordered the BMW and can't wait.
Sure, I'll have to put up with the image problem, but when you do 60,000 miles a year, driving pleasure is more important than image etc.
If you have a new model A4 congratulations - its a nice car. But if you are considering a change, you should try the BMW. Some of you may wonder what I'm on about, but some of you will love it!
Cheers
J