You can do it through VAG-COM, do you know anyone who has got it? Or if not then someone who lives nearby you will most probably have it as a large number of members have access to Vag - COM.
Oh and also S3 for a courtesy car?! which dealer did you use????
As above - you can do it with VAGCOM. My MY07 A3 had it set when it left the factory but I have enabled it on my old MY04 A3 and several MkV Golfs.
There are two settings - one is Auto Lock which locks above 12mph and the other is auto-unlock which unlocks the doors when you remove the key from the ignition.
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